Stolen Valor Claim After Man Poses As Elite Administrative Soldier Tony April 6, 2012 Army 63 Comments Follow Duffel Blog: RICHFIELD, OH – On a normal Friday night at the Clearview Bar & Grill, U.S. Army Reservist Specialist Wendell Dukes had ordered his usual Rolling Rock and was minding his business. He had recently returned from deployment to Bagram Air Base, Afghanistan, where the harsh environment had denied him everything, from Wi-Fi to good cell reception to even a decent printer. What it never denied him however, was a sense of pride. Dukes and his fellow administrative specialists (MOS 42L) had worked hard and earned the respect of their peers and, according to the 19 year-old soldier, “Nothing moves without orders and orders don’t move without us! You have registered mail? Good luck getting it there without our signature!” So you can imagine Dukes’ dismay when a man he had never seen before — walked into the bar — and claimed to be a member of his elite unit. “He was wearing this—well for lack of a better term, it was a costume-and said he was just back from downrange. He wore some strange medals I hadn’t seen before — crooked — and I noted right away that not only were his ACUs freshly pressed, but the dead give away was the complete lack of a carpal tunnel brace on the forearm and no paper cuts on the fingers. It was amateur night.” Dukes takes a swig of his Rolling Rock. His eyes now take on a far off look. “I earned my cuts, damnit! It was then and there I knew my fellow 42Ls and I were being robbed. ” Dukes didn’t get mad however. He decided to get even and lured the man, Mr. Ben Faquir, into a story of his many exploits — a popular method poser hunters often use to call out phony veterans. “It was all downhill from there,” Dukes said. “He starts off ‘So, there I was…in the shit…the coffee was gone. We were out of doughnuts.’ Anyone who’s been downrange knows full well Green Bean is almost always open and we’re hip deep in pogey bait, so there’s no excuse. I called Stolen Valor after that.” After Dukes’ tip, the FBI decided to investigate. In what was a open and shut case, Mr. Faquir was tried and sentenced to a $10,000 fine and one year’s probation. He could not be reached for comment at the time of this article. Although this story had a happy ending, it’s still not enough for Wendell Dukes. He encourages all 42Ls not to allow their profession to be sullied by posers. “It’s like they think they know what’s it’s like, behind the wire, when the chow hall’s out of ice cream and server lag keeps you from playing World of Warcraft. You shouldn’t let anyone think they know what that’s like. Not unless you’ve been there.” Ken Landgren says: April 16, 2014 at 1:24 AM He is the Austin Powers of Special Ops. Cassie Page says: April 16, 2014 at 1:24 AM Lol Todd Canty says: April 16, 2014 at 1:24 AM ADMINISTRATOR OF DEATH! Joseph Fernandez says: April 16, 2014 at 1:10 AM Is this for real? Robert Daniel says: April 16, 2014 at 1:10 AM I remember when we Army Admins were 71Ls, not this newfangled 42L crap, who’s running this outfit nowadays? Mike Meadows says: April 16, 2014 at 1:10 AM Commander in Chief is a liar so why you busting this guys balls John Trester says: April 16, 2014 at 1:10 AM Yeh, tell me abut it. Back in the PI during Nam…pounding a Remington manual for at least 5 hours straight, wearing a scarf to stop the draft from the AC, and then you find out the fridge is empty because the last shift did not refill the coke machine. Talk about pain. I know that some guys were good at flying jets in dogfights, or sneaking through the jungle with 80 pound packs, but I could run an adding machine one handed by touch as I totaled up the cargo manifests…no, please, no medals for me. I was just doing my job. Elijah Davenport says: April 16, 2014 at 1:10 AM Paper cuts down range are no laughing matter. They can easily become infected with all that third world country bacteria and slow down typing by quite a bit. if a soldier has to delay a mission because he’s waiting on his SGLI to get updated, that’s when lives are put at risk! I hope none of you thought I was being serious! Joe Oliver says: January 4, 2014 at 5:09 PM LMAO – a lot of my volunteer time is volunteering with the PoW Network chasing wannabe more than they could be.. it was neat to find a parody on the issue. http://www.facebook.com/TheFakeWarriorProject http://www.fakewarriors.org Chuck Butler says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Hysterical! Michael Hasbun says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM ELITE! Schuyler Williams says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM WOW PAPER CUTS! Nick Brugger says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM God Bless you, Soldier! Bill Dudsic says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Omg that was a great article! Charles Lewis says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM This is useless trash, But yet ,,, I Can’t stop laughing. Christian Sinclair Waggoner says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM I almost have to give it to him for having the balls to pose as a megaPOG Logan Riley Hall says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Umm… Error noticed. It’s 42A not L… Last I checked. Nick Suarez says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM I don’t care what your job was when you are down range….the fact that your down there says more than the people that make up excuses not to go and still want the kudos. Mr. Faquir needs a good ass whoppin’! Trevor Richmond says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Elite as shit? I think so, but 92y is far leeter. bullets don’t fly without supply baby! lmao Huascar Rico Moreira says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM People like him and Johnny Bea a fat lard in facebook, bring shame to this nation. He wear an ACU during Veterans Days so he feed his PORKY face at Golden Corral and anywhere else he can get in for free with the uniform. He hides behind the freedom of speech excuse. He is nothing but a heart attack waiting to happen. Check him out on YouTube, his fat sorry piece of grease. Aaron Freed says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Hey, here’s a question for all of you. How is it NO ONE has noticed that the picture is a complete violation of OPSEC because there are SIPR computers clearly visible?? “Oh no, don’t mind me, I’m just going to take pictures with my personal computer while I’m wandering around a classified area!” I don’t care if someone is combat arms, sustainment, or what, but I care about people not doing stupid and illegal shit like THIS. Stuart Clark says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM BWAHAHAHAHAHA Doc Bailey says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Whew. For a second there I thought All I was going to hear about were SEALs. I think even the POTUS was jumping on that bandwagon. Of course he IS wearing the biggest patch. SVA seem to LOVE the 1st Cav patch and Stetsons. Just once, I’d like to see someone steal valor from the Electric Strawberry or the Bloody Tampon. Aren’t my units worth stealing valor from? Thomas Morton says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Wow LMAO who the hello would want to pretend to be a paper pusher what a retard xD Jim Speed says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM We HATED the “Paper Weenies”.. all except the Disbursing Clerks.. they made sure we got paid. Screw everyone else.. LOL Jake Perry says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Hahaha David Boucher says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM If you ever have been out wire, an elite paper pusher could be a god send also are ththe heart an soul of a well pla planned missions Erika Allen says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Lolz! I loved this story Robert L. Rice says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM When I was in Vietnam, we had a Captain commit suicide, the Colonel awarded him a BRONZE STAR for fighting off a viet cong attack! this is NOT BS., if you haven’t been there, and done that, keep quiet, we don’t need or want any wannabees! Don Shipman says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Are you not entertained! Maximus Matt Thornton says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM I almost died. This shit is absolutely epic. Nick Paz says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Fuck both these dudes n there fuckin doughnuts …get fucked Alex De La Fuente says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM It’s really sad that people would do this, they must really hate their lives in order to make up this fantasy world in which they pretend to be service members. On another note, what the hell is up with all the medals given out to admin guys for valor? I’m prior Air Force and even I cringed when I read recently how an Air Force Sgt. got such a medal for her 6 month tour in Afghanistan in the finance department. This totally belittles the medals received by solders out in the field risking their lives. There should distinguish merit accordingly and not just give such medals out to just anyone who does a good job in their respective career field. A co-worker put it best when he said, “That’s a slap to the face of all who got one while being out iin the field!” Corey Schultz says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM The thing that kills me about this post and the April Fools fake news story the Army puts out every year is the MULTIPLE people too dumb to realize it is a joke. Some people’s kids… Joe Lobban says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Not trying to be an ass, but didn’t all 42L’s have to mandatory reclassify to 42A’s? Scott Sloniker says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Very Funny…… Jennifer Martin says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Finally! Someone wakes up and wants to play an admin bubba! I ♥ the DuffleBlog! David Cho says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM LOL!!!! Raziel Zukovski says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM hahahahahahahaha Dan Caddy says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM The duffel blog is great because the comments section easily identifies people that are so retarded they should be forced to wear a helmet at all time. it’s SATIRE people…. Susan Shannon says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM lol- great tongue-n-cheek! great article. Brian Chandler says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM You know, it’s almost too funny watching these posers try and act like a hero. I’d be willing to have fun with it. I’ve been in the Army for 12 years, and it’s easy to spot these cowards out. First and foremost, try giving them a PT test. Roxanne Adcock says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Some of you guys have a hard time with The Onion too, don’t you?/. Dudley Toelke says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM What I want to know is, how come I got a tab from Ranger School but not Clerk-Typist School? That ain’t right! Joe Oliver says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=448760751832702&set=vb.448481241860653&type=3&theater Song: Stolen Valor. Panda, Stephen Hobbs, Soldier Hard, J-Deuce, SABO & BQ. Tha Emcee Shot and Edited by: Nick Katz Films Redcon-1 Online. Joe Oliver says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=448635071845270&set=vb.448481241860653&type=3&theater Stolen and I Know It. http://rangerup.com/ presents our homage to Stolen Valor. Inspired by LMFAO’s Sexy and I know It. Performed by Big Ol Band. Artist: LMFAO, S.K. Gordy, K. Oliver, G. M. Robertson, DJ Listenbee, E. E. Beck — in Durham, NC. John Donovan says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Alright, that’s funny, I don’t care who you are. Michael R. Hopper says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Having been a 42L, I am proud to call this Soldier a comrade-in-arms! You know, you can lose an EYE if someone shoots a paper clip with a rubber band! This is no joke! GunnyandMary Collett says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Bwahahahahahahahahahaha! Matthew Ellsworth says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM LOL…FINALLY, someone posing as something other than a SecretSquirrelNinjaDeltaSpecialForcesRangerSealReconPararescueSWATSniper. That’s some funny stuff. David Beach says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM …I know the warrant officer in the picture. I have worked with before while in Iraq..I am sure he would get a kick out of it or sue them..LOL. Sam Williams says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM 76Z Jason Benghazi Smith says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM I was an elite combat communications operative. Damn, that sounds really bad@$$. Beats radio operator hands down. Pat Konze says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM Down and out, this is some funny shit. Jon Gohn says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM I’m glad I was taking a dump when I read this, or I would have shit my pants laughing! Mark Culbertson says: January 3, 2014 at 1:55 AM While paper pushers have their part I wouldn’t hardly call them an elite unit as that takes away from real elite units such as Rangers, Sappers and Special Forces. Good job on calling the guy out though. Mark says: September 22, 2012 at 8:24 PM I have been combat arms, combat support and support services (25 years AFS Army). The most frustrating, and thankless time of my career was in support services. Mark says: September 22, 2012 at 8:24 PM Story was still a good laugh.