June 2012

USS Haditha Captain Erik King Has Been Reassigned Pending Investigation

Due to the controversy surrounding the events of the USS Haditha and the ship’s sinking of a Chinese fishing vessel (and subsequent machine-gunning of survivors), Captain Erik King has been temporarily reassigned to Arlington National Cemetery.

Continue Reading →

Church Outraged After Care Package Returned, Included Note Asking For Porn, Beer

by Merrick

COLUMBUS, OH - Leaders of the Unity Church of God were recently surprised after one of the many care packages they have sent to anonymous service members overseas was returned with all of its original contents — but had an additional note inside from the soldier who had received it. The note read: “Thank you for [...]

Continue Reading →

Duffel Blog Radio News – June 29th, 2012

by Paul

CLICK TO SUBSCRIBE TO PODCAST ON ITUNES [TRANSCRIPT] Hello, I’m Chip Flightline with the Duffel Blog Radio News. Here are your top headlines around the military this week. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: SOLDIER SCREWS UP POWERPOINT SLIDE, ENDS WAR IN AFGHANISTAN Earlier this week outgoing ISAF Joint Command leader Lt. General Curtis Scaparotti announced to assembled press [...]

Continue Reading →

Navy Submarine Avoids Tragedy, Whale Rape Off Virginia Coast

by johnp

NORFOLK, VA - Having an unknown contact appear off the stern can be a frightening scenario for many submariners, but it’s even worse when that sonar blip is searching for a mate. The close shadowing of numerous submarines by whales was recently revealed by Admiral William Wysocki, Director of Submarine Services for the Atlantic Fleet. “We [...]

Continue Reading →

The Duffel Blog Reading Workflow

by Paul

If you’re unsure of how to read the Duffel Blog (many of our recent commenters are), we’ve made this handy infographic to help you with the reading workflow of the site. Enjoy, and hope you’ll share this with friends.

Continue Reading →

New ‘Pro-Sin’ Religion Extremely Popular In Infantry Units

by G-Had

KANEOHE BAY, HI – The newest faith to practice aboard Marine Corps Base Hawaii doesn’t meet in a chapel, a synagogue, or a mosque. In fact, it usually meets at a local strip club. “Shots all around!” shouts Navy Lieutenant Eddie Moore, as he and seven other infantry Marines and sailors finished off their second bottle of Absinthe for [...]

Continue Reading →

US Denies Prisoner Torture, Allegations Of Forced Listening To Justin Bieber, Rebecca Black

by Pte Bloggins

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The Pentagon has denied initial reports out of southern Afghanistan that Marines have tortured prisoners after an embedded journalist reported the playing of Justin Bieber songs to “extract intelligence.” New York Times reporter Thomas Brennan claimed that Taliban fighters were forced to endure songs like “Baby” and “Someone to Love.” He also described [...]

Continue Reading →