General Mattis Crashes RNC, Shreds On Triple-Neck Guitar For Grunts In Helmand
TAMPA, FL - The Republican National Convention was unexpectedly interrupted last night during Mitt Romney's acceptance speech by an extremely loud guitar solo from CENTCOM Commander General James Mattis.
After having personnel from his headquarters at nearby MacDill Air Force base set up speakers, amplifiers, and a stage outside the convention center, Mattis began "ripping it" on his custom, triple-necked electric guitar which he named "Shock and Awe".
The unexpected appearance was made in response to a challenge issued by Ted Nugent, who was scheduled to play the venue.
“I hear he’s good with a gun, but can he do this?” Nugent said as he proceeded to grind out a gnarly double handed chromatic scale at whirling speed.
Mattis arrived on stage, standing erect, on the top of a Bradley fighting vehicle. The vehicle had been retrofitted with a 16th century French pipe organ “to give me the grooviest fill between my solos,” said Mattis.
He then hopped off the vehicle, and three Marines gingerly …
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