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Author: Addison Blu

Army veteran, writer, nerd.AddisonBlu.com
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NASHVILLE, Tenn. — Maj. Gen. Terry Haston, the adjutant general for the Tennessee National Guard who ended and ruined several careers over a lighthearted reenlistment video featuring a puppet, has revealed that he was severely mistreated by a dinosaur puppet as a child, sources confirmed today. The T-rex puppet, worn by his uncle Steve and […]
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RAQQA, Syria — A recent honor graduate of the Islamic State Suicide Bomber School of Excellence has publicly voiced concerns over the sexual experience of the 72 women awaiting him in the afterlife, sources confirmed today. “I’ve never been with a woman before, so there’d be no sexual skill between all of us virgins,” said […]
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CAMP LEJEUNE, N.C. — After hearing about the despicable nude photo sharing being conducted through a private Facebook group called “Marines United,” highly-respected Marine company commander Capt. Christian Stone immediately threw his government workstation to the ground and crushed it to a pulp in a fit of rage, sources confirmed today. “I just can’t believe Marines […]
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