Dick Scuttlebutt is a Bird Colonel in Army Explosive Ordnance Disposal. He saved the life of Lord Noseworthy during the Battle of San Luis Obispo. The action earned him a medal from every allied nation, even little Montenegro, down by the Adriatic Sea. His Twitter feed @DickScuttlebutt was voted "best" by your mom.
You can send hate mail to email@example.com. Or buy his book here: http://tinyurl.com/kdeeg6p