Military Spouse Gets Chip Bag Stuck On Its Head

AUGUSTA, GA — The spouse of a Ft. Gordon soldier is breathing easier after a military police officer removed a Doritos bag from its head. Several witnesses reported to law enforcement officials that they saw the spouse wandering on lawns in…

Separating Soldier Dies Rescuing DD-214

FAYETTEVILLE, NC — A soldier has died after being struck by a vehicle on Skibo Road, mere minutes after having left the Army, military officials reported. Police said the cause of the accident was the soldier's attempt at retrieving his…

Military To Stop Adding Saltpeter to Chow

WASHINGTON, DC - Boot Camp just got a little bit harder. Military officials announced that Basic Training dining facilities will stop adding saltpeter to their meals, as part of sweeping efforts to reduce dangerous substances in troops'…

Top Drone Pilots Battle At Elite Training School

CORONADO, CA – Two months ago, Senior Airman Rod Wilkins was a flyboy without a war. Due to what he describes as “typical military bureaucracy,” his Unmanned Aerial Vehicle (UAV) unit at the time remained stateside without any real…

Soldier Fights For, Gives Up American Freedoms

SWAINSBORO, GA - Friends and relatives praised PFC Brian Malloy today for his commitment to fight for America's freedoms, apparently unaware that he himself has given up those same freedoms, report sources from a recent family barbecue.…

Pentagon Channel Celebrates 100th Viewer

FORT MEADE, MD - All three employees of the Pentagon Channel (TPC) attended a lunch yesterday to celebrate a major milestone in the network's history. This week's Nielsen ratings reported that two separate viewers tuned in to TPC last week,…

Taliban Charge Rapper Chris Brown With Stolen Valor

KABUL, AFGHANISTAN — Taliban lawyers have filed formal charges against pop singer Chris Brown for "falsely representing himself as a Taliban terrorist," according to court documents obtained by Duffel Blog today. The charges were filed in…