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Tag: DB

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CAMP LEJEUNE, N.C. — A Marine sergeant major has been charged with driving under the influence soon after his unit celebrated a month without any alcohol-related incidents, sources confirmed today. Sgt. Maj. Flavio Perez was arrested Wednesday for allegedly driving with a .12% blood-alcohol content and punching a police horse in the face after getting […]
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CAMP LEJEUNE, N.C. — Marine Gunnery Sgt. Lyle Coolridge has developed an innovative new leadership method called the “T.H.R.O.A.T.P.U.N.C.H. System” to solve his unit’s morale problems, sources confirmed today. According to Coolridge, the system draws on some of the most cutting edge management practices and psychological research to maximize morale among his Marines and remedy […]
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CREECH AIR FORCE BASE —Local Unmanned Aerial Vehicle Banshee 31, who completed his first deployment just two months ago, is still droning on about it like he’s some sort of goddamn hero, sources confirmed today. “I swear, if this guy tells one more story about the Camp Arifjan Green Beans I’m going to ground him,” […]
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