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Tag: Deployment

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CREECH AIR FORCE BASE —Local Unmanned Aerial Vehicle Banshee 31, who completed his first deployment just two months ago, is still droning on about it like he’s some sort of goddamn hero, sources confirmed today. “I swear, if this guy tells one more story about the Camp Arifjan Green Beans I’m going to ground him,” […]
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CHARLOTTE, N.C.— A soldier in the bathroom of the USO Lounge at Charlotte/Douglas International Airport was reportedly screaming, “What have I done?” over and over again for several hours last Thursday. Lounge attendant James Abrams says the screaming began at 8am and continued through noon with only small breaks for loud sobbing. The soldier was identified as […]
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Jimmy’s Tavern — Two Army veterans with similar experiences in combat have been unable to top each other’s tales from Iraq and Afghanistan and now transitioned to stories of masturbation, sources confirmed. “These two guys are regulars, and I usually ignore their B.S, but this time it was over the line,” said bartender Jimmy Montoya. “We had kids […]
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