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Tag: Football

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FOXBOROUGH, Mass. — Not even 24 hours after a dramatic overtime victory over the Atlanta Falcons, the New England Patriots have become embroiled in new controversy by not giving credit to the real heroes of Super Bowl 51: America’s veterans. “Sure, Tom Brady may have five Super Bowl wins and single-handedly orchestrated a 31-point comeback […]
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WASHINGTON, D.C. — Football’s growing controversy over the use of the name “Washington Redskins” came to a screeching halt after the U.S. Army massacred the entire team, then promptly confiscated all its land and property, sources confirmed Monday. Elements of the 7th Cavalry Regiment, airlifted in on UH-60 Black Hawks, fast-roped into FedEx Field in the great history, tradition and legacy of […]
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AFGHANISTAN — Deep in the most remote regions of Afghanistan, loyal San Francisco 49er fans serving in a Recon platoon are eagerly awaiting news of their beloved football team, and speculating on how satisfying it will be to beat the “Sheattle Cheathawks” in their own domain. Lance Cpl. Richard Gutierrez, a San Francisco native now stationed at […]
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INDIANAPOLIS, IN – Pentagon and NCAA sources have confirmed that military action against Bashar Al-Assad’s regime in Syria will be delayed until after the completion of the 2014 college football season. The NCAA, which has long been criticized for the enforcement of its archaic code for student athletes, is now taking an active role in […]
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