Browsing Tag

Government Shutdown

NSA Analyst Tries To Sell Secrets To Russians, Fails

FORT MEADE, MD — His financial stability rocked by furloughs, overtime cuts and stagnant promotions, NSA Senior Analyst Eric Delhugh was having trouble paying his bills. He considered himself a patriotic American but Delhugh was desperate.…

Army Runs Out Of Red Tape

WASHINGTON DC — The Army's top logistician has confirmed that due to the government shutdown, the Army has completely run out of red tape. "We've been relying on our emergency rainy day stockpiles of 3M 764 Red Vinyl Tape for the past two…