Japan

OAHU, HI — A sailor stationed at the Pearl Harbor naval base last night commemorated the anniversary of the attack that brought the US into World War II by downing 75 sake bombs, sources confirmed. According to fellow sailors, Petty Officer…

YOKOSUKA, Japan — The commander of US Naval forces in Japan, Rear Adm. Matthew Carter, is reportedly “disturbed and baffled” by a report that drug incidents among sailors stationed in the island nation have skyrocketed almost 900% in recent…

WASHINGTON – Just days after President Obama directly apologized to Japan for dropping the atomic bombs in World War II, White House sources now say the President is mulling an apology to Japan for the attack on Pearl Harbor. According to…

CHIYODA, Japan — This morning, on the 73rd anniversary of Pearl Harbor, Emperor Akihito admitted in a public comment that the Japanese sneak attack that brought the United States into World War Two was “kind of a dick move.” "We are taking…

CAMP SMEDLEY D. BUTLER, Okinawa — Lance Corporal Timothy Braithwaite and his wife, Melanie, were dismayed last weekend to discover that they had confused the word “kabuki” and the word “bukakke,” leading them to attend a show very different…

NAGASAKI, Japan – Iran's top diplomat has spoken out on the 70th anniversary of the atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, condemning the "senseless" use of nuclear weapons against a "non-Zionist country." Foreign Minister Mohammad…

PEARL HARBOR, Hawaii – Ask any number of the Japanese tourists wandering around for their opinion on America, and you might get a thumbs-up or an apologetic bow acknowledging the attack here 73 years ago. Seaman 2nd Class Hikiro Tamagotchi,…

YOKOSUKA, JAPAN — Sources confirmed a sailor with Commander Fleet Activities Yokosuka (CFAY) has been spending a majority of his free time in a base gym locker room trash-talking homosexuals while completely nude around other men. Master at…

YAKIMA TRAINING CENTER, WA – Tensions are high between the United States and Japan after the closing ceremony of Rising Thunder 13 was ruined by a disgruntled Navy veteran of World War II. The exercise, conducted by the 3rd Stryker Brigade…

SAN FRANCISCO, CA — Security guards at San Francisco International Airport have come under severe criticism after an elderly Pearl Harbor survivor complained that they confiscated one of his war mementos as a "perceived security threat."…

OKINAWA, JAPAN - Supply Company Gunnery Sergeant Dan Williams confirmed today that despite a wide range of accomplishments and experiences in the Corps, he had absolutely no idea what an infantry Sergeant was saying during a conversation…

OKINAWA, JAPAN – The Marine Corps has begun crashing its MV-22 Ospreys on Okinawa, a top Marine general has confirmed. Lt. Gen. Terry Robling, the commander of Marine Corps Forces Pacific, told Duffel Blog that Marine Medium Helicopter…

FOB GERONIMO, AFGHANISTAN – As the light of the full moon shone over the zen garden in back of the company combat operations center, Captain Jaisun Tyson presided over the seppuku, or ritual suicide, of his dishonorable retainer, Corporal…

PHOENIX, AZ – At some point or other, most people wind up with too much stuff.  Whether it's after school, moving, or through inheritance, many either throw it away, donate it, or sell it at a yard sale. But local man Derrick Shaftoe has a…

Washington, D.C. – Top military officials met with the President this week to discuss actions and further sanctions against North Korea. The meetings come after the latest international media frenzy out of Pyongyang: the launch of a rubber…