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Author: Bravo

A pessimist masquerading as a realist who's secretly an optimist. Can even, but chooses not to most of the time. Would rather be doing literally anything else right now.
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NAVAL STATION NORFOLK, Va. — In the wake of a series of high-profile scandals involving top-ranking Air Force and Army officials, the Navy’s senior leadership is scrambling to bolster its image of sexual prowess in order to compete with the other services for officer recruits. “After Tailhook, we rode high for years,” said Rear Adm. Thomas Marotta, deputy […]
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FORT KNOX, KY — The U.S. Army Recruiting Command’s top officer was called to testify before Congress after an investigation by the Inspector General’s office determined that powerful subliminal messages were hidden within the iconic “Army Strong” recruiting song, commonly used as a background soundtrack in Army recruiting commercials and videos. In testimony before the House […]
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FORT LEE, VA – The deputy commander of the Army’s Public Affairs Office is seeking assistance from leaders of major Army commands in reducing instances of “photobombing,” which renders combat photographs unusable, and often makes the public relations war unwinnable. “Our job is to get out there and capture real-world moments in combat, so that we can […]
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FORT SAM HOUSTON, TX – With the drawdown in Afghanistan approaching, the Army is experiencing an unexpected surge in soldiers being declared medically ineligible for redeployment to garrison, the Army Medical Command announced. “It’s a disturbing trend,” said Lt. Gen. Patricia Horoho, U.S. Army Surgeon General. “We need to be able to maintain our uprange […]
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