Author: L.T. Original G.

L.T. Original G. is an old school pot scrubber who went to basic training back when it was actually hard. He's probably got more time on leave than you have in the Army. Today he's the kind of leader who drinks a Dr. Pepper out of a Coca-Cola glass and doesn't give a damn. You can criticize him on Facebook or Twitter @LTOriginalG

By L.T. Original G.

National Infantry Museum to host gallery of porta-potty artwork

By L.T. Original G.

On May 16, 2018

FORT BENNING, Ga. — The U.S. Army’s National Infantry Museum and Soldier Center plans to host a gallery of artwork etched and scratched into the walls of porta-potties on U.S. military bases worldwide, highlighting the incredible creativity of men and women in uniform. “I’ve never seen so many cocks in one place before. And I’ve […]

This female private is the worst soldier ever, says sergeant who recently asked her out

By L.T. Original G.

On May 10, 2018

ABERDEEN PROVING GROUND, Md. — Army Pvt. Naomi Gage is the worst soldier in the history of the service, says a sergeant who recently asked her out on a date. Gage — a soldier who recently joined h

Opinion: Hey, can you stop comparing me to American soldiers?

By L.T. Original G.

On November 12, 2017

The following is an op-ed article written by Jesus. Seriously fam. See that guy’s shirt in the picture above? Stop wearing this stupid shirt. Ever since I met those Roman soldiers in the Garden

Army to rename slave cables to freedom cables

By L.T. Original G.

On November 8, 2017

FORT BRAGG, N.C. — The US Army will rename the cables used for most wheeled and tracked vehicle platforms to jumpstart dead batteries from slave cables to freedom cables, sources confirmed today. “It came to the attention of the Chief of Staff that the name slave cable was incredibly insensitive to our African-American Soldiers, some of […]

SEAL Team 6 raid on Baghdadi home cancelled due to Calibri font use in PowerPoint

By L.T. Original G.

On February 22, 2017

TAMPA — A raid by the Navy’s SEAL Team 6 to kill or capture the leader of ISIS was cancelled this morning after the operations officer helping to plan the mission used the Calibri font in his

Trump to repurpose USS Enterprise into floating hotel and casino

By L.T. Original G.

On November 17, 2016

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President-elect Donald Trump announced that he would re-purpose the retired aircraft carrier USS Enterprise (CVN-65) into a floating hotel and casino, according to a new press r