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Category: Marine Corps

BERKELEY, Calif. — Military recruiting offices have been overwhelmed with millennials seeking to join the Pentagon’s upcoming “Safe Space” Force, sources confirmed today. The proposed force came at the suggestion of President Donald Trump while speaking to a group of young Marines stationed in Miramar, California. The speech was later shared on social media by a […]
WASHINGTON — The Marine Corps’ Lance Corporal-in-Chief delivered his State of the Underground address earlier this week, promising his fellow E-3s that the lance corporal underground has “never been stronger,” sources confirmed today. “The number of working parties is at a 30-year-low, allowing even more of us to enjoy playing Xbox in our barracks room […]
CAMP LEJEUNE, N.C. — Marine Gunnery Sgt. Lyle Coolridge has developed an innovative new leadership method called the “T.H.R.O.A.T.P.U.N.C.H. System” to solve his unit’s morale problems, sources confirmed today. According to Coolridge, the system draws on some of the most cutting edge management practices and psychological research to maximize morale among his Marines and remedy […]
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