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Meet The Team

Paul Sharpe

Troops ask to live with Mattis after divorce is finalized


Opinion: We were winning when we left

Maxx Butthurt

Air Force Combat Controller shares the best method for clearing a room filled with insurgents

Dick Scuttlebutt

Army leadership calls for “disruptive thinkers” to step forward so they can be more easily liquidated


Advice: Ask an NCO’s Signature Block

Drew Ferrol

Navy plans to reduce suicide by monitoring sailors at all times

Epic Blunder

Nation’s cryptologists emerge from SCIF, predict another month-long government shutdown

Lee Ho Fuk

DUFFEL BLOG PRESENTS: Top 10 phrases used by subordinates, and what they really mean

Cat Astronaut

Fossils of prehistoric staff officer found frozen in Afghan Conex box

Jack S. McQuack

Drinking eight Rip Its a day could help you live longer, study by specialist with no teeth says

Addison Blu

Dan Crenshaw stabs Pete Davidson in the eye, or whatever

Slab Squatthrust

Coast Guard helicopter totally forgot why it came out here in the first place


DUFFEL BLOG PRESENTS: Holden Caulfield gives your weekend safety brief

Sgt B

Trump vows to learn identity of unknown soldier during Memorial Day speech


Top military officers confused by Harvey Weinstein suffering consequences amid harassment allegations

The Shammer

Duffel Blog Presents: 26 mythological creatures the troops have heard of but never seen

Dirk Diggler

Admiral Ackbar indicted in ‘Fat Jabba’ scandal

Frederick Taub

West Point Cadets expelled for racially motivated salute

Joe Zieja

E-4 accidentally joins actual mafia in mix-up

Ted Heller

SHAMEFUL: Homeowner Association orders combat vet to remove flag from his lawn


Army sergeant’s steampunk top hat springs class III leak in formation


Rubber rifle finally gets confirmed kill

Juice Box

TALK LOUDER: A Military Guide To Group Work

Lieutenant Dan

Nation’s spies enroll in Trump Intel University after president says they should go back to school


Navy SEAL: The best way to tell people you’re a Navy SEAL is to tell them


#WTF? Army ends program to support ‘Generation Z’ recruits


Opinion: Are we dead or just in Kuwait?

Jake Slager

Captain Li Shang relieved of command for toxic masculinity

Kate C

Woman with sheepdog allergies in critical condition following night with SEAL


Military Spouse Gets Chip Bag Stuck On Its Head


Navy plans to swell recruitment and retention through increased use of phallic imagery

Dark Laughter

Trump warns rival nations of ‘frighteningly random’ reaction to any aggression

Erik Sullivan

Trump’s plan for Syrian civil war stalls after Risk board game runs out of pieces


Air Force suffering from massive sky penis envy

The Leg Ranger

Senator proudly cites DNA test to prove he’s nearly 1 percent veteran

John "Whiskey Tango Foxtrot" Mittle

Pro Athletes To Ask Troops For Military ID Prior To Giving Up First Class Seats

Andrew Calin

Point/Counterpoint: Noise discipline must never be compromised vs. A fart is always funny and should be celebrated


Entire military granted shaving profile following Gillette commercial

Duffel Blog Staff

DARPA announces it will no longer do work for Google


Skills training program teaches transitioning veterans to stop drawing penises on everything

Mason Bube

Soldier stationed in South Korea relieved Trump is canceling exercise


Jody Moth makes sure soldier’s lamp is okay

Jack Mandaville

Opinion: I support the troops 100% as long as they agree 100% with my political views

Danger Close

Marine dies waiting for pair-of-socks transplant donor

Bolo Bill

Zip-tied Somali pirates bet on how many SEAL memoirs they’ll be in


DUFFEL BLOG PRESENTS: Rudyard Kipling gives your weekend safety brief

As For Class

Leaked: Fortnite revealed to be Ender’s Game

Joe D.

Charles ‘Wide Neck’ McDowell leads USO Tour request voting

Wob Weego

ISIS leader has volunteers for suicide bombings but no one will read his screenplay

The Wolfman

Potential employer says ‘veteran status’ is ‘sooo 2010’


Coast Guard unveils ‘Maritime Darwinism’ policy after getting $2.28 billion budget cut on its birthday

Courtney Massengale

Dead AK-47 Inventor To Be Buried In Mud For A Week, Cleaned Off, Then Put Back To Work


Chipotle modifies Veterans Day promotion to exclude fat soldiers

Maxwell McPoyle

Marine who hasn’t slept in 32 hours is lazy and undisciplined, platoon sergeant reports

Roger Wilco

Afraid of talking on radio, Millennials Snapchat for fire


Last American president to actually win a war has passed on

da kine

Major Openly Hoping For Separation


‘I still like beer’ says soldier at 2nd DUI hearing


Lieutenant sets land navigation course record during Bird Box challenge


Corps To Issue Afghanistan Campaign Medal To Garrison Marines

Paul Silk

Navy warns sailors who can’t deploy that they will be reviewed for promotion

Bull Winkle

Black Mold replaces Black Knights as official Army mascot

Philip Block

Trump announces Afghan troop surge, new Kabul hotel project


General Mattis Takes ALS Ice Bucket Challenge

Knee Deep Sailor

Crew super freaked out by new cook who didn’t join for the signing bonus


Soldier avoids UCMJ by living inside amnesty box

Gruff Sparty

Army hopeful new combat fitness test will turn the tide of war in Afghanistan

Semper I



Coast Guard tells families to “sell your organs, start hooking” to help cope with government shutdown

Pte Bloggins

140% Of Crimeans Vote To Join Russia In Landslide Referendum

L.T. Original G.

National Infantry Museum to host gallery of porta-potty artwork

Joey Miami

Point/Counterpoint: If Colin Powell were alive today, he’d be 82 years old! vs. I’m Colin Powell, and I’m not dead

Notorious SSF

Female Cadet Rushes Home With Copy of Grand Theft Auto V, Can’t Wait To Experience Raging Misogyny


Navy and Disney partner to offer ‘the most magical deployments on earth’


Navy Chief Who’s Proud To Be A Chief Wears Chief T-Shirt That Says So

Justin Coates

OUTRAGE! This Green Beret may get in trouble just for MURDERING someone!


DHS Purchases 1.2 Billion ‘Domestic Anti-Personnel’ Rounds

Lt Hicox

Taliban assure negotiators they’ll totally stop fighting after the US leaves

Saint Andard

General breaks jaw while talking out of both sides of mouth


Poll: Support for another Crusade at highest level since 14th century

Little Bear

Self-described ‘sheep dog’ actually more of an asshole than anything else

Hammer Lip

Terminally Ill Make-a-Wish Child Accused Of Stolen Valor


New Urinalysis Tests Whether Military Members ‘Actually Give A Shit’

Frederick Benteen

Chinese Hackers Access Performance Reviews Of 3 Million Shitty Federal Workers

Ross Magee

Dick Cheney Negotiates No-Bid Contract To Maintain Insurgent Humvees


Pentagon Mandates Suicide Prevention Briefings For Afghan Troops

Dirty Harry

Trump replaces Kim with Trump on redesigned peace talks challenge coin

Loose Change

NSA Launches ‘Revenge Porn Site’


Neller wishes Mattis would hurry up and approve his Memorial Day leave request


DoD To Charge Admission Fee For Base Access To Fix Budget Shortfalls

Phil McCracken

DoD to require passwords to be changed every day, use at least 27 different letters


Camp Lejeune residents invoiced for any superpowers developed after water poisoning


Tricare to extend benefits to that girl you hooked up with two years ago

Perpetual Captain

Army Specialist earns recognition at company demotion ceremony

Shawn Robbins

Some Americans Believe Coast Guard Is Massive Wall To Keep Mexicans Out, Study Finds

Smelly Infidel

Don’t Ask: One Year After DADT Repeal Sergeant Major Tells, ‘Still Work To Be Done’

Nick Shafer

Female Marine Charges Obstacle Course With Sexual Harassment

Jake the Rake

Brave Airman Sends Steak Back At DFAC, Fights For Well Cooked Meal


Book Review: Military Thriller ‘Fifty Shades of Green’ Hits Bestseller Lists Worldwide


Absence of assassin from future confuses ambitious company commander


Army Fortnite Lieutenant Goes Missing During Navigation Exercise


Marines with no combat experience haze Marines with equal amount of combat experience


Air Force begins lobbying for next trillion-dollar flying clusterfuck

Major Psilocybin

Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps placed on Body Composition Program

Ricky Recon

Troops Issued New Karzai-Approved Rifle Combat Sights, Engraved ROE

Jay Hollis

Pentagon officials fear ISIS militants now armed with reflective belts

Angry Staff Officer

DUFFEL BLOG PRESENTS: Jane Austen gives your weekend safety brief


Lockheed Upbeat Despite F-35 Losing Dogfight To Red Baron

Jim Garamone

Officials Note Progress in Afghanistan, Difficulty for Taliban

Captain Obvious

Retired sergeant major discovers freedom is free

Wet N. Sandy

ISIS Threatens Attack On Puppy Bowl

Charlie Foxtrot

Fleshlights Issued To Male Soldiers In Bid To Decrease Combat Zone Pregnancies

Troy Livingston

Army radiologist awarded for spotting softball-size tumor

Dirty Mac

Art Criticism Draws Outrage From Guantanamo Detainees


Marine Killed By Complacency In Afghanistan

Otto Miller

Army To Lower Divorce Rates By Training Soldiers Not To Marry Strippers