Tag: Language

2014 Unintelligible Staff NCO Of The Year Award Announced

On September 15, 2014

WASHINGTON, D.C. — “What?” With this one ironically clear word, the 148th United States Unintelligible Staff Non-Commissioned Officer of the Year (USOTY) Competition effectively came to a close. The question, asked by Dr. Stuart Kline, this year’s head judge and one of the world’s foremost experts on the USOTY competition, was followed by thunderous applause […]

Navy: Tagalog To Phase Out English As Official Language

By Epic Blunder

On April 16, 2013

WASHINGTON, DC – In a press release Wednesday morning, Chief of Naval Operations Jonathan Greenert announced that the United States Navy will change its standard operating language from English to T

Supply Chief Has Complete Conversation With Grunt Without Understanding Single Word

By Rob

On December 6, 2012

OKINAWA, JAPAN – Supply Company Gunnery Sergeant Dan Williams confirmed today that despite a wide range of accomplishments and experiences in the Corps, he had absolutely no idea what an infantr

Army To Cut Back on Vernacular Cliches, War Story Exaggerations

By Tony

On June 9, 2012

FT LEONARD WOOD, MO – As part of recent cut backs proposed by the Pentagon, the Army is being forced to ration it’s own vernacular to save valuable training time. Everything from catch phrases to the proverbial exaggerated war story — and even standard expressions, are to be cut by 50%. Phrases like “It ain’t rocket surgery!” and […]

DLI Couple Will Last Forever, Reports Boyfriend

By Ron

On April 12, 2012

MONTEREY, CA — Do you speak the language of love? Well two students at the Defense Language Institute certainly do. Private First Class Mike Keenan, 19, and Private First Class Tina Lowry, 21, are