Salaam Alaikum, Brothers, I see you’ve completed the training facility just in time for the latest group of shahid to arrive. Let’s see: bayonet course … check....
Are you a suicide bomber aspirant struggling to succeed in today’s saturated market? Are you envious that everyone is calling Yusuf the “Damascus Dominator” because he...
SYRIA — ISIS is initiating a caliphate-wide safety stand-down after one of its members injured himself on Monday with his own explosive device in New York...
SAN JUAN, Puerto Rico — Weeks after the island of Puerto Rico was devastated by Hurricane Maria, huge swaths of the territory are still without power,...
THE PENTAGON — In response to the unexpected soiling of a lieutenant’s underwear, every member of the U.S. armed forces will now be required to wear...
KANDAHAR, Afghanistan — After more than a decade tromping through the deserts and mountains of Afghanistan, the Joint Force has been diagnosed with arthritis, according to...
RAQQAH, Syria – Kaalim al-Ibrahim, a front-line fighter for ISIS, has marked himself “safe” on Facebook after a firefight with US Special Forces, sources confirmed today. The...
RAQQA, Syria — Amid a rapidly-deteriorating military situation on all fronts, the self-proclaimed Islamic State has released a new video threatening to “release the kraken” against its...
ST. CLOUD, Minn. – Shane Williams was standing in line at Orange Julius with his 6-year old daughter when the screaming started last week. Instinctively, Shane...
WASHINGTON — President Obama has released 15 detainees from the Guantanamo Bay detention center to make room for incoming waves of Syrian refugees, sources confirmed. This was the second major announcement...
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Following two incidents this month where veterans of the armed services murdered police officers, Republican presidential candidate Donald J. Trump and GOP congressional leaders are...
RAQQA, Syria – A suicide bomber admitted that he had completely forgotten about Mother’s Day and it was too late to fix his mistake, sources confirmed....
TAMPA, Fla. — The popular arcade game “Whac-A-Mole” has released a new “Jihadi Edition” designed specifically for game rooms in U.S. Central Command’s (CENTCOM) Moral, Welfare,...
VATICAN CITY — For the first time in seven centuries, support for a new Crusade topped all other economic, religious, and foreign policy concerns, according to yesterday’s Vatican/CNN...
PARIS – The French judicial system is reeling in shock after the controversial sentencing of Salah Abdeslam, a captured terrorist involved in the November 2015 attacks...
