Church Outraged After Care Package Returned, Included Note Asking For Porn, Beer
COLUMBUS, OH - Leaders of the Unity Church of God were recently surprised after one of the many care packages they have sent to anonymous service members overseas was returned with all of its original contents -- but had an additional note inside from the soldier who had received it.
The note read: "Thank you for the kind gesture. Unfortunately, I have no need for any of this stuff. Please send porn and beer."
It was signed as 'Every American Soldier Ever'.
After extensive investigation, the anonymous soldier was tracked down and identified as Specialist Christopher Applewood with 3rd Brigade, 2nd Infantry Division.
When reached for comment, Applewood was unapologetic.
"I don't see why they're so mad. How many toothbrushes, decks of playing cards, or little packets of gum do we need? I get that stuff at the PX. I'm twenty years old and haven't had sex in fourteen months. My balls are so blue they're cobalt. I'm not exactly sure what that means but lets just say it's bad."
The note has set o…
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