Pentagon Releases Preliminary Military Spouse Rank Chart Paul July 22, 2012 The Pentagon 185 Comments WASHINGTON, D.C. — The Pentagon has released a preliminary artist rendering showing a chart of the proposed military spouse ranking system. The chart released late last night reflects ranks set forth by the Pentagon under the newly formed Spousal Code of Civilian Justice, with the ranks of S-1 through S-9. The Pentagon has still not yet released a decision as to whether officer wives would be allowed an official spousal rank. Vehicle stickers are already being printed for use on spousal POV’s so they can receive their due respect, along with a spousal rank chart to educate the force. Don't miss the next story.Get the latest news and alerts from Duffel Blog delivered to your inbox—free. Short URL: http://duffelblog.com/xHA2B Angel Kay says: January 28, 2015 at 8:29 AM To funny Kevin Smith says: January 15, 2015 at 10:14 PM God damned stupid if you ask me. Kevin Smith says: January 15, 2015 at 10:14 PM If you ain’t in the military then don’t even think about wearing that shit. What a gaggle fuck stupid idea Robbie Carroll says: January 15, 2015 at 10:14 PM I always hated hearing “I’m COLONEL so-and-so’s WIFE”, they never EARNED that rank. Sit and wait your turn like everyone else, was my response. Medics don’t CARE about rank. Scotty Wells says: December 22, 2014 at 11:44 AM Haha, Love it! But..But but why not one with girlfriends too? They are going to feel left out.. Also if you are dual active duty can you add an extra ribbon? Lastly what if you out rank your hubby? Tbone Thom says: December 22, 2014 at 11:44 AM This has been a running joke for quite a while lol Bill Goodwin says: December 15, 2014 at 5:59 PM (parody) WHY ???? Seems a bunch of folks in the Pentagon have a lot of time on their hands, as well as little or no common sense. Our tax dollars at work once again. Can’t pay soldiers a decent wage – they spent the money on this BS. Next thing will be kid ranks, buddy ranks, paramour ranks,”I’m single” ranks, etc. I have two dogs who might want a rank, too. Natasha LeeAnn Tolson says: December 15, 2014 at 5:59 PM What about army husbands? Did everyone forget that us females can be married too? Stephanie Schnaible says: December 11, 2014 at 7:59 AM Don’t need this rank, I already earned mine when I was enlisted. You can keep the salute as well. I do enjoy the O-6 parking spot at the commissary that my hubby earned though. Jon Reid says: December 11, 2014 at 7:59 AM They should have a Staff S-9. Like command Master Spouse. In place of the star should be a plate. David Eckert says: December 11, 2014 at 7:59 AM This is great. Even more entertaining than the article is the fact that there are people on here that are dumb enough to think this is real. Millard Kinnison says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM And they did this ………………………..because? Boredom must be hell. I’m sure our troops could use some help. That would take care of boredom….permanently. The Deployment Diatribes says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Very clever! Barbara Clerihue says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Even though this site is a satire, it would have been nice for the writers to acknowledge that “spouses” can be men. Men who don’t always cook well. Kit ONeill says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Satire at its finest, as evident in the comment section! LOL!!! Candie Lopez says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM This is dumb n u should be ashamed of yourself!!! How dare you insult our military with this bs spouse rank! Tonya A Speace says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM I think the *crossed utensils* are rather appropriate considering the weight my spouse gained with each rank I earned. I was wondering…for the blood stripes, does the spouse get commissary carts? Tamira Ashley Emes says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM . Ricardo Arciniega says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM My wife is mother of a Soldier, she like to have a officer rank Ryan Sevart says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM This seems extremely sexist as though only women can be military spouses. Linda Beccue says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM This is fack. This is a satire websute. Your an idiot if you believe this. Trevor C Jones says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Spousalist? Lol Jeffrey Jarriel says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM As popular as the Duffel Blog has become, I cannot believe there are still people arguing over their articles. Really? Marcy Gregg Smith says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Wow, so many wives getting upset! It’s a joke people!!! Sheesh, lighten up!! Raymond E Howard says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Can they give orders to lower ranking spouses? William Safford says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Many years ago I got my wife a squadron beer stein with crossed mop (swab) and broom on a first class crow, Christian K Harris says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM This is a pretty sexist system Stephen Wohlschlegel says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Needs more dependa. Nachelle Osorio says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Holy friggin dumb! Arthur Frymyer Jr. says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM I agree with the ladies who are complaining about the knife and fork insignia. I can make my own sammich. Might I respectfully suggest they be replaced by a crossed broom and mop instead? Those don’t fit my hands at all. Now if everyone will excuse me, I think I hear my mommy calling me. *runs like hell* Timothy L. Baker says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM BS. You want a rank? Sign on the dotted line. Tammy Agnor Algoe says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Please tell me this is a joke. Sheila Keener says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM It’s Satire people ……..nothing true about it at all! Sonya Gielow says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM How dumb! Military spouses do not deserve any rank sorry I am a soldier and I have yelled at by a spouse before because she acted like she was wearing her husbands rank. No civilian will ever tell me what to do! Only my leadership will. The soldier deserve the rank not the spouse. The don’t work for it and they don’t deserve it…hands down! Meloni Courtway says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Are you kidding me? A knife and fork? First of all, women don’t need to wear anyone’s job on their shoulder, and secondly, this pink disaster is sexist and oppressing. I hope this is a joke. John Rooks says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM With the comments I’ve read it just proves that most military wives. Have very little in the way of IQ and in fact the one thing they do have going for them is a vagina and with what I know to be true. Most of those lousy whores money makers are busted and beat all to hell. Get a job and a life and stop patting yourselves on the back for sitting at home and spending some poor dumb joes hard earned money Leah Hadley Cebulski says: December 4, 2014 at 3:43 AM Of course it has to be pink. And a knife and fork? Aw, how cute. Not sewin’ those on anytime soon, and thank God! Rebecca Dowdy Wooster says: August 29, 2014 at 10:14 AM About the stupidest thing I have seen in a long time. Sad thing is that there are spouses that think they deserve this and be more to follow! Paul Suarez says: August 27, 2014 at 12:44 PM You never go full dependa Jason Griffith says: August 27, 2014 at 12:44 PM All we need more spouses saying my husband men is a 1SG so you have to listen to me bs Mathew Carson says: August 27, 2014 at 5:13 AM Where does Dependasaurus Rex fit in there for those spouses that think they are in charge of actual shit? Andy Thornburgh says: August 22, 2014 at 7:14 PM http://cdn.meme.li/instances/500x/53664577.jpg Katie Huber says: May 10, 2014 at 4:40 PM LMAO, love! This is great! Nick Bowers says: January 8, 2014 at 3:09 AM The funniest thing about this site is all the idiots who think its real. Modina Arkills says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Awesome! DanellandBenn Wilhelm says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I freaking love it. Aaron Lozano says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM This has to be a joke, right? Frederick Aquino Marcaida says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Lol, this gave me a good laugh this morning. Don Fox says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM idk, this looks kinda cheesy to me… Joe McGillian says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Haha omg ‘Spousalist’ cracked me up. Paul Taylor says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM made for the Army fags by the looks of it. Jeanne Bishop says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Do they have light blue ones for the boy spouses? Kevin Bunn says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM What about the Officer Wives List? Is that still in the think tank? Benjamin Midkiff says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I will totally buy one of these for my wife if you all start making them. This is hilarious! Jamie Lyn Guzman says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM my husband would laugh his arse off if he came home to one of these on our truck… this is awesome! David Bernal says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I would laugh so damn hard if I ever saw a spouse trying to “pull rank” lol. My wife would knock their teeth out lol. Chris Camacho says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I’ve been a single soldier since the start of my military career.. But I say again army wives are ridiculous Ashley Riddle says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Just sitting here thinking of all the drama these would cause makes me giggle! I can just see some knock down drag outs in the commissary haha. Hi-larious! Lance D Gulick says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM this is the dumbest thing I ever heard of.. and really a knife and fork? how demeaning… some spouses actually have real jobs and lives… they aren’t all sitting at home popping out babies, staying in PJ’s and reading 50 shades of grey….. pathetic Bill Parris says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I want this for my wife she’d eat it up haha. Marianke Phillips says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Rank wearing wives need a slap back into reality. And what’s up with the knife and fork? Michael Bennett says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I personally think that just because your spouse has rank does not make u any different than any other civilian because they are the ones serving not you….i understand that you have to deal with the deployments as well but every wife/husband has times that they cannot spend time with their significant other Dustin Wright says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I really don’t think the people who would parade this stuff around need any more encouragement. Next to this, you are likely to see the one that reads- Army Wife: Hardest job in the military. Kimberlyn Calvin's Daughter Jahelka says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM uh correct me if I’m wrong… but I believe that this is just a playful thing… ya know in the home type of thing? There are a lot of people who are getting their damn panties (men & women) in a twist caz of this ranking system! DER I do believe that they are JUST JOKING by this… wow… take a chill pill people! Mylinda DuRousseau says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Traci Smith you need to get Jim one of these, since you are the boss now! Prithvi Jagannath says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM DI: SENIOR SPOUSE IS… Recruits: SIR, SENIOR SPOUSE IS: 3 STRIPES UP, CROSSED UTENSILS IN THE MIDDLE, BACKBONE OF THE DEPENDENTS SIR! Samantha Abigail McDonald says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM This has got to be one of the funniest things I have ever seen. It’s sad that posts like this have to be written to show certain military spouses how ridiculous they are for demanding things that are of no right to them. I certainly know I didn’t earn my husband’s rank therefore, I have no right to throw it in anyone’s face. I earned my own when I was in the military, but even then I demanded nothing except for time with my family. Brian Michael says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM No cup-cakes? Wc Hurtt says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM That’s perfect! lol Kate Edmonds says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM HAHAHA Made my DAY. Seriously. Tony Whited says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I would love to see the Officer ones! Tyler Tomaszkiewicz says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM should I point out how sexist those are? Jennifer A. McMillen says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Say what? No WO ones? LOL =D And I agree with Faith… no extra rank for prior enlisted? Patrick N Rachael Kelly says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM What ever happen to the saying that wives don’t wear their husbands rank? Michelle Datus says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I object to the kitchen utensils. and pink. can’t get down and dirty in pink. how about prettier colors of the military service. nice blue for air force, sage or leaf green for army etc… E.j. Rupert says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM What happens if I get called back into AD? Does my wife keep her same rank? lol Jay Rodriguez says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM FRG is already bad enough, but seriously? Spouse ranks? No deal. This is just going to cause problems, it will lead to spouses trying to tell service members what to do becuase they have a certain “spousal rank”. its going to cause problems within the FRG becuase the spouse, who most have not served, are going to try to act as if they can make others do things. Spouses… are civilians, unless dual military marriage, they don’t have rank, they have not earned it and their for should not have this. William Fuzi says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM They can kiss my ass. This is a bad idea. Last thing in the world we need is military spouses trying to give soldiers orders. If you didn’t earn the title, or do the time you don’t rate anything but comon curtesy. You can’t get rank by injection. Who ever thought this up is a moron. Next thing you know they will be prosecuting military member for not following orders from some master seargents wife. You want respect sign up and earn it! Tommy Whitmore says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Here dear…..your new rank insignia, now go make me a sandwich! Jessica Mitchell says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Lmao that is to funny lol when you become senior spouse do you have to go in front of a board too? Keith Zanetti says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM this is fucken retarded. Joseph White says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Okay. Apparently nobody told them that the spouses of military soldiers vastly outrank the soldier in his house. If he’s a sergeant, his wife is a sergeant major. Serene Nicole Contreras says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I am somewhat offended by the implication of the knife and fork on the insignia… Can we get something that doesn’t perpetuate the archaic army housewife stigma? Luke Dellinger says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM So fucking stupid, they don’t rate shit, I hate how they think they rate the proper greeting of the day too, Bitch I don’t even know who you are! And no I will not salute you because your husband is an officer, He rates a salute not you! Lucien Bañales says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Instead of a knife and fork I think the insignia should simply be a purse, cause that’s exactly where your balls will be when your spouse starts parading that shit. David Schreiner says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM So how does this work for dual-military? Would my wife and I wear our rank & the spouse rank simultaneously? What happens upon retirement? Or divorce? What happens to a dual-military couple that retires and then gets divorced? Helicopter Steve Danger Bixby says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM We joked about it for too long I’m afraid. Milena De La Hoz says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM To my military spouses what do you think about this? Nick Ha says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Do I get one of these if my wife is the one in service? Reagen Paule says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Above: Rank and insignia of enlisted spouses. Note: Spouses of Commissioned officers just wear their spouse’s rank. I BET THE NAVY CAN GET MORE FANS THAN THE MARINE CORPS says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM they totally ignored the naval spousal enlisted ranks of chef, senior chef and master chef……smh. Charlotte Grace Linnan says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM so if you marry your spouse after the are in the military do you start at the bottom are do you automatically get the equivelant to your spouses rank lol what’s next ranks for the children lol. Randy Knipfer says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I don’t know if this is a joke or not. Dependents are just that, a dependent of an enlisted or officer member in the U.S. Armed Forces, wither they are a wife, husband, child, and some times a parent. They do not HAVE the rights to anything connected with the military. It’s a privilege that they got through their spouse WHO is in the military. It appears that a lot of officer’s wife believe that they have the same rank and privilege as do their husband. I have seen officer wife play the pecking order game for meetings. They’ve even figure out down to the minute of when their husband graduated from their military academy, (West Point, Annapolis, Air Force), to get their seating at a table or in a row. I’ve even seen enlisted dependents who thinks that the military is their for their own interest. They forget that if their husband was not in the military they would not be getting those privileges that was earn by their spouses. If this is true it’s just wrong. Justin E. Miller says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Priceless. I love that we assume all spouses are overeating females. I guess male military spouses could be the same and have an affinity for pink as well, however. AJ Ketchum says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I guess the Marines assume spouses are enlisted (these are based on USMC rank). In the Army we refer to our wives are “Household 6″ assuming a command relationship and officer rank. My wife ranks at least full bird promotable by now. Vanessa Truog says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM If you don’t know Duffelblog is satire site then you have issues. Josh Totherow says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM no this is stupid bc it plays into the fact some military wives think they rate some shit bc their married to a servicemen when you say your hubby is an e-7 and wait for a response your more than likely going to be laughed at or punched in the face bc your stupid. Dana Josephson says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM This is fricken stupid. WE DON’T RANK! We don’t earn the rank. Nicki Richard says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM This has GOT to be a joke! 95% of military spouses are bad enough as is! Half the time they think they deserve special treatment because of their husbands rank, and will act like they’re better than everyone because of their husbands rank…so the pentagon is going to basically give them a right to act like the self righteous that they already act? This has got to be a joke, who in their right mind would go through with this? Celeste Fick says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Yes! I’m going to slap it on my gigantic bragg bag and let everyone know mah rank! Roger Ramirez says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Not sure what is funnier – the chart itself, or the comments by the people who think this is real…lol. Aaron Hastings says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Whoever came up with this should be water-boarded. Julika Smith says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Wonder if I’m eligible – I’m a retired Chief Master Spouse. If this is only for active duty spouses, I’m going to write my Congress person. I also want one of those vehicle stickers so I can park in the reserved Commissary and PX parking spaces. Lastly, I’m going to start a petition not to allow officer’s wives to get an official spousal rank. After all, sequestration is looming and we have to save money. I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time. Thank you! Ray-John Ramos says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM This has to be a joke right? Leslie Vanover says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM So this blows my mind! and will somone tell me what will happen if the famale is the one on active duty, will they still be pink? Or will it be blue for male spouses LMAO! WTF is this , this is just a silly joke right? Jonathan Paul Sielaff says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM LMAO love the stuff. I’ll put a Senior Spouse decal on the passenger side of my Jeep. Can’t find them anywhere on Cafepress, is Duffelblog just joshing us with that as well? Ray-John Ramos says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I hope this is like a april fools joke. This is seriously retarded,and you and i both know there are people who will take this seriously. If you want rank, go through boot camp and earn it!!! Clarissa Navarro says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM just cuz this guy Chris had a bad expierence trying to turn a hoe into a housewife dnt mean were all bad.. js I have been an army wife for 4 yrs and have never ever even thought of doin shit like that like people say its an insult but there out there so sory u feel like that but dnt be dissing us all just cuz u got delt a shitty hand! Nikki Rae Gowing says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I hate this more than anyone could Everex understand. Working in health care in the tricare system u really get to see people use their spouse rank as a reason for rudeness. They should assume NO special privileges and should be embarrassed to receive any. And while a lot of military wives are faithful and strong during deployments…it is absolutely statistically true that most aren’t. It’s sad and disheartening and it ruins the men they hurt. So if its not you, don’t be offended, but if it is u…eff off u effin whores. Chris Camacho says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM The average army wife or military spouse is just ridiculous… Dumb fucking hoes that would fuck your battle buddy John Chalus says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Now the Army is proving how far ahead of the other branches it is. Grant Lindberg says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Ha! I have a feeling this website is going to be another time-vaccuum. Monte Taylor says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM This link is bullshit. Anthony Eagan says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM These look like JROTC ranks, need to spiff them up! Vladimir Querales says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM This is so stupid as if it wan’t bad enough already! Derek Alan Rader says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM What no Officer Spouse Ranks? Perry Humphries says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM ok Scott Addis says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Fucking stupid Mrclls Mcknly says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM THIS IS A SATIRE PIECE!!! IT’S A JOKE!!!!!! Richard Galli says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM officers wives get to wear a crown, of varying sizes/grades Pedro Vera says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Then there’s the dependopotamus. Brenda Soots-Klawitter says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Ladies, chill…………this is satire—Like “The Onion” or Colbert etc etc Marena D'Orio Gilbert says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I hope this is some kind of joke!!! I’m a military spouse and a veteran and would NEVER disrespect the uniform by wearing a made up, unearned “rank” like this. David Ledet says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM FOR THE DULL & UNINFORMED…It is called S A T I R E People. Lighten up and laugh. Bryan Jackson says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I love standing gate. It is so awesome when you refuse to salute an officer’s wife. Because, you know…. I love getting my ass ripped a new one by my W/C when he gets that phone call from the LT. Super awesome. Man, I love my job. Amanda Vanorsdale says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM I’m having a hard time taking this military spouse rank thing seriously. And why is there a a fork and knife on it? Is it because we’re only here to cook or that we just sit at home and eat all day? Andrea BossAwsome Michelle says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Omg…. I think that the knife & fork are frigging hilarious, that is an epic.way of giving them what they want but mocking them at the same time. Erin Williams says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM This is crazy… A spouse does not wear her husband’s rank. The accomplishments of the husband do not directly reflect the wife or vise versa. It’s one thing to be proud of your spouse and what they have accomplished, but if you didn’t accomplish it yourself, you don’t deserve any credit or perks. Women need to get over it and handle their lives like grownups. If you want the perks that go along with anything, then you need to go out and put forth an effort instead of living vicariously through someone else. Faith Patterson says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Do I get extra rank for being prior service? lol Judy Federigan says: January 3, 2014 at 4:53 AM Whomever made this OBVIOUSLY isn’t married. A knife and fork? Please. Put a fucking BON-BON in the middle. and the S-9 needs to have a little gold couch on it as well. Gomer says: October 29, 2012 at 7:33 PM What ranks do servicemen’s daughters acting in a barracks whore position receive ? Ditto spouses pulling TDY in a barracks slot. Philip says: October 16, 2012 at 9:03 PM Great Job DB….Great articles Paul says: October 16, 2012 at 9:55 PM Thank you very much sir! Exchequer says: September 24, 2012 at 10:28 AM “dependopotomuses” who you can hear getting fatter as they trundle down the aisles” Thomas Spencer, I love you man. Thomas Spencer says: September 1, 2012 at 11:36 PM After being pushed around by the retirees, their wives, and all of the “dependopotomuses” who you can hear getting fatter as they trundle down the aisles, I don’t see this happening, or taken seriously even if it does. Shit, I was in the gun club for twice as long as most of the LT’s that thought they deserved my salute when I was weighted down with groceries, and I had been promoted at least 3 more times. Haters gonna hate! Lthrnek89 says: August 23, 2012 at 12:22 PM If a service member is issued a wife after bootcamp and together they ascend to an E-6/ S6 paygrade. If they should get divorced: 1) does she carry the rank with her and transition into the InActive Spousal Corps pending review for potential RETREAD or retired for being unfit for duty and unable to continue valuable service. 2) If the service member then finds a younger, more fit, and physically stunning wife- does she rate a meritorious promotion to S6 or does she have to start in the barracks and work her way up? Thomas Spencer says: September 1, 2012 at 11:38 PM she starts in the barracks, and works her way up the ladder. Lee says: August 21, 2012 at 2:41 AM As a military police officer, I always find it ather humorous when I pull a spouse over and the first words out of their mouths is “don’t you know who my husband is?”. Um, yeah, like I have a directory of base personnel at my disposal. My response normally is,”no, I do not, but allow me to introduce myself to you.” I pulled you over, not your husband. PO3 says: August 17, 2012 at 1:23 PM I do have a question: I know this website is geared more towards our dear groundpoundering Army and Marines, and as the bastard child of the Army, the Chair Farce could utilize these same spouse ensignias. However, what about us Navy folk (and I guess the Coasties too) who have different insignias for their enlisted? I’ve read a lot of officers demanding seperate spouse rank insignias for them and I was hoping, if not too much trouble, for the same to be done for your fine sailors. La-a says: August 17, 2012 at 1:11 PM OMG some of you people are fucking retarded. Please do not reproduce. Just die. WOW says: August 15, 2012 at 4:43 AM This is great and appropriate for the women who think they have rank because their husband wears it! The best part for me are the comments from the people who take this seriously! I mean seriously the Army has more important things to do. Does he really think the Army took time to figure this out .. Wait hold on, I guess it is a possibility! slade says: August 6, 2012 at 1:52 AM I cannot fathom that some of you people took this for true. for those of you in the military….I hope your not in charge of anything important. Richard Jacobs says: July 31, 2012 at 3:01 PM Spouses* sheyla demoraes says: July 30, 2012 at 1:26 PM A military wife does deserve a rank! I am a Army mom and my travels to different countries no to mentioned, wars… my sons wife have to adjust to all these changes quite often but she doesn’t complaint. how about getting pregnant and having to move her house to another estate or country! So please people give those spouses a RANK they surely deserve it!! God Bless all of you and our soldiers,their spouses and our wonderful country,U.S.A Richard Jacobs says: July 31, 2012 at 3:00 PM If the Spoues want a rank, they can enlist in a military service and get one. Mike says: August 4, 2012 at 5:02 PM Boom! Owned Jodie says: August 16, 2012 at 7:54 PM Are you fucking kidding me? First, you do realize this is a joke, right? Second, really? Good for you. You want a fucking medal? I’m a military spouse, an army mom, currently pregnant, AND work full time on ACTIVE DUTY. So yes, I have a rank. My own… not my husband’s. And being an army wife and a mom and being pregnant isn’t THAT bad. I mean I still have some free time to read satire. Jodie says: August 16, 2012 at 7:55 PM Ps. I really hope you were just joking and I read that way too fast… LOL. maybe I do need some sleep. Kristine says: July 27, 2012 at 10:27 PM Check out my response (A Marine Wife): http://usmclife.com/2012/07/a-wifes-response-to-pentagon-proposes-controversial-policy-assigning-ranks-to-military-spouses/ Sgt L says: July 27, 2012 at 6:28 AM So… If the spouses get rank, then for instance.. they should be kept within weight standards.. If not, then Uncle Sam can Issue a new fit spouse to our Marines. PO3 says: August 17, 2012 at 1:20 PM ^ Approve. former Sgt O' Marines says: September 3, 2012 at 6:07 PM Holy shit!! Your comment was the best part of this. Bravo good.sir. Bravo. fivenine says: October 18, 2012 at 3:04 AM holy shitballs…..best thought of the century there!!!!!! Kim says: July 24, 2012 at 10:53 PM You have got to be friggin kidding me!!!!! I will refuse to EVER have rank as a spouse. Why would I ever want to outrank my friends or have my friends outrank me. Can you imagine the cat fights at an FRG meeting. We as spouses have NO rank….we are all doing the same job. They can count me out if they give wives rank!!!!! I really don’t want it if it has silverware on it. What the heck…..I think it should have $ signs on it to show how often we go to the mall or something fun….cooking…hahahaha. Maybe pieces of pizza to show how ofter we order take out because at the end of the day we dont really feel like cooking. Pits and Shagrins says: July 25, 2012 at 5:50 PM Actually ma’am, as an Army spouse you have no say in this fight. You will have to wear the appropriate rank, regardless, and the FRG will have to deal with that. You will be assimilated and resistance is futile. Also, quit thinking outside the box. Your ideas about different symbols just clouds the issue. Where would it ever end? And quite honestly, we (the outside observers of Army spouses) would never need a pizza sign to show Army spouses like pizza. We can clearly see the expanding waist sizes and cushion indentations with our own eyes!!! Big smiles!! SGT N says: July 24, 2012 at 2:51 PM holy shit balls RipWaxmaster says: July 25, 2012 at 7:35 AM holy flaming shit rockets! Major Major Major says: July 24, 2012 at 1:02 PM I demand that appropriate officer grades be created for OUR spouses! Susy says: July 23, 2012 at 11:46 AM At Brett, go shoot yourself. You are too stupid to live Pits and Shagrins says: July 23, 2012 at 6:41 PM Susy, much love for you and your post! Thank you for the laugh!!! The Loon says: July 23, 2012 at 7:51 AM Thank you, Duffel Blog, for giving us a rip-roaring start to the day! P.S. Can’t wait for the day a virtual slap goes through the interwebz to those commenters who fail to read the “About Us” section…….mind you, the little dears are so darn entertaining. Lt. Butero-Trinkejo says: July 22, 2012 at 9:07 PM I DEMAND that there is differentiation between officers and enlisted. How is a measly S-5 supposed to know that my beloved Muffin is an Officers wife? I simply will not stand for her to be treated as a lowly S-1…. QB says: October 8, 2012 at 8:14 PM Draft in works at HQDA. The officer wifes insignia will all be the insignia of a colonel and they will be designated OOS-6 (Oversight Officer Spouse). Duties include explaining what the officer ment to say. Semper Fi Daywalker says: July 22, 2012 at 4:45 PM Just like with Military Working Dogs, the spouse is going to be one rank higher than the service member. (This is not intended to come across as military wives being bitches, just in-case you get the wrong idea about the dog reference). Brett says: July 22, 2012 at 3:36 PM Really? What’s the point of this? The Army has more pressing issues than this. My wife thinks its retarded. Lt. Butero-Trinkejo says: July 23, 2012 at 2:27 PM Brett, luckily I cannot ascertain your COC from your title, because they would be getting a call from me. Next thing you are going to challenge is the safety of the PT belt… QB says: October 8, 2012 at 8:02 PM Now that’s leadership LT. Well done! Semper Fi Pits and Shagrins says: July 23, 2012 at 6:40 PM Brett, I can only imagine the “fascinating” conversations you and your wife have at night. Guessing they involve crayons and staying inside the lines…. Lt. Butero-Trinkejo says: July 24, 2012 at 8:31 PM No the last conversation we had was the wording of a strongly written letter to the makers of crayola over the fact that Purple does not taste like grape and red does not taste like cherry…. Lt. Butero-Trinkejo says: July 24, 2012 at 8:32 PM Oh wait you were talking to Bret…Muffin and I have never had conversations about the flavors of crayons… Pits and Shagrins says: July 25, 2012 at 5:43 PM Absolutely hilarious! Thank you!!! QB says: October 8, 2012 at 8:03 PM You lie! La-a says: August 17, 2012 at 1:13 PM Brett your speaking privllages have been revoked dwadafam says: July 22, 2012 at 11:36 AM I so want my S8 sticker. It’ll make the last 23 years following him all over the world and having to live in awful places like Alaska, Germany and Portugal worth it. For the humorless, I am being sarcastic. RipWaxmaster says: July 22, 2012 at 11:55 AM What? Wow. I almost took you seriously. dwadafam says: July 22, 2012 at 12:05 PM aaron black says: July 22, 2012 at 12:50 PM Your statement and the chi-chi avatar made this incredible! hahaha Becky Newman says: July 22, 2012 at 1:37 PM Chris Camacho, I take it your spouse was with YOUR friend? Did you ever stray from the marriage bed? You had NO right to say what you did. Yes, you did say average. But then I’ve seen many military men who didn’t know what fidelity meant. So don’t judge women when it’s a two way street! Oh by the way, I was not only a spouse, but, also on active duty! And I took this as A JOKE! Lighten up people. We all know that military spouses have no RANK!!!! Marianke says: July 25, 2012 at 3:46 PM We live in Alaska, and are nearing his retirement, we’re staying here! Love it! The outdoors is absolutely amazing, hiking, back packing, mountain biking, kayaking, water rafting, atv ing, camping, fishing, snowboarding, skiing, snow shoeing, and more. It’s awesome! Just absolutely gorgeous here! RipWaxmaster says: July 22, 2012 at 9:19 AM Haha! You guys have been busy. And to think that wanker on FB yesterday told you to be productive. I fart in his general direction. Good work!