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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 116 · Tuesday, 29 September 2026

Air & Space

Space Force’s new uniform puts a little goose back in the step

White House says redesign projects discipline, strength and “absolutely no historical parallels”

Military leaders debate who gets to masturbate first in sniper arch

Mitch McConnell returns from extended drill weekend

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Vol. 15 · No. 116

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Vol. 15 · No. 116 · Deployed worldwide

Tuesday

29 September 2026

2137 Zulu

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Navy & Marines · Page 5

Navy replaces all sailors with Overpaid contractors to cut costs

Filed · 1546

Secretary of the Navy Ray Mabus

NORFOLK, VA - Secretary of the Navy Ray Mabus went on a tour of the USS San Antonio today to promote his new initiative to separate all enlisted sailors and replace them with civilian contractors.

"This is a great way to save the Navy money," Mabus said as he explained the reasoning behind the pending decision. "Every sailor costs the Navy roughly $300,000 a year, so we decided to give them all generous separation packages and rehire them as contractors at double their enlisted salary. It won’t cost a thing to recruit or train them."

Many observers noted that Mabus has ignored the fact that they were previously recruited and trained by the military.

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