CAMP PENDLETON, CA — Testing the effectiveness of the M50 Joint Service General Purpose Mask in a room filled with tear gas is a staple of annual training events for Marines since boot camp, but one Marine refuses to participate, insisting that her chain of command is comprised of fascists typical of Nazi Germany.

Private First Class Dalia Bettelheim says there is a little-known Marine Corps Order stating her exemption from the training, and her personal disposition towards the act of being crammed in a room and gassed has become another sensitive issue in the realm of political-correctness oft plaguing the military.

"My friend told me that Jewish Marines aren't required to enter the gas chamber," said Bettelheim in a recent interview, "on account of the Jews being forced into gas chambers by the Nazis during World War II."