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Toddler Who Ignored Military Protocol Receives Non-Punitive Letter Of Caution

LITTLE FALLS, Minn. — A three-year-old boy who did not wait for his soldier mother to be dismissed from a pointless formation after serving nine months in Afghanistan has received a non punitive letter of caution for breaking ranks, Duffel Blog has learned.

“It’s the most egregious violation of military customs and traditions I’ve ever seen in all my years of service,” said National Guard Command Sgt. Maj. Milton Stiff. “This young lad’s decided lack of discipline is appalling and if his parents won’t deal with him then the U.S. Army will.”

The non-punitive letter, issued by the command of the boy’s mother, reads in part: “You are hereby reprimanded for your substandard conduct during the company’s reunion ceremony upon returning from Afghanistan. It is your obligation as the son of a non-commissioned officer to conduct yourself with dignity and professionalism at all times. This letter, being non-punitive in nature, serves to administratively admonish you for displaying a lack of military bearing and adherence to Army Values expected from a family member of a soldier of the Minnesota Army National Guard.”

Command Sgt. Maj. Stiff was reportedly incensed when he received the boy’s hand written rebuttal which was composed of a single word in crayon: “POOP.”

“If we allow parents to hug their undisciplined children in formation then the terrorists win,” Stiff said. “What ever happened to using the five S’s of the escalation of force? When unauthorized children approach a formation, soldiers are to Shout, Show, Shove, Spank to Warn, Spank to Discipline. This is a complete breakdown of our core values. If we were in Sparta I’d have thrown the little oxygen thief off a cliff by now.”

Ever since video of the three-year-old’s reunion with his mother went viral there have been increased reports of outraged first sergeants and sergeants major throughout the Army National Guard. As of press time, however, no one in their right mind seems to give a rat’s ass.

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Margaret King

where does he get off saying “If we were in Sparta I’d have thrown the little oxygen thief off a cliff by now.” this is worse that what the toddler did. It also appeared they were at ease in the formation which made what he did a little less horrible to those who see this as a big problem

Patrick Clarke

Hi Look Mommy’s Home !!. XX

LaWanda Kinard
I am absolutely horrified by almost all of the comments made on this page against this 3 year old child. That is his mother, period. Get over yourselves. This child is not endangering us, because this is not a war situation. It is a welcome home, and I say THANK YOU to each and every one of our soldiers. I so love seeing this, because many of the stories we have to read are about our soldiers returning home with PTSD, losing parts of their bodies, or being brought home for last respects. This is, indeed, a beautiful homecoming story.… Read more »
Robert Beach

Dipshit officers, leave the boy alone, he missed his mom while she was overseas fighting for the freedom of the US. That includes the freedom to go up and hug his mom. I support our military except for worthless jackasses like the few of you

Pamela Renee Pendergrass Watkins

He’s just a 3 yr old CHILD. NOT a soldier. A dependent of parents that are in the Guards. I’m a former navy dependent and if I was his age I would have done the same thing for not being able to see my parent for 9 months!!!!!!!!


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