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Seasonal, Pumpkin Spice MREs Set For Release

NATICK, Mass. — Fall is arriving early as the Pentagon’s Combat Feeding Directorate announced the nation’s service members will be able to enjoy new seasonal versions of Meals, Ready-to-Eat (MREs), Duffel Blog has learned.

“The Directorate has worked continuously to update MREs to reflect the current preferences of our armed forces,” said Phyllis Ray, a senior food technologist. “We’ve seen an odd trend recently showing our warfighters prefer foods that actually taste good and reflect seasonal foods American’s enjoy back home.”

Ray went on to elaborate that a breakthrough in food preservation and barista technologies have allowed the Directorate to concoct the next generation of MRE flavors.

The following seasonal MREs are scheduled to be rolled out this fall:

  • Pumpkin Spice Taco Pasta
  • Spiced Chai Black Beans
  • Lasagna Latte
  • Venti-tarian Delight

This October the Combat Feeding Directorate is also expected to release an all candy Halloween-themed MRE which has proved popular in test evaluations.

“This is the best MRE ever,” said one evaluator through a mouthful of candy corn. “It’ll make going to the field totally worth it, but you still won’t be able to shit for a week.”

SEE ALSO: Military Quietly Phasing Out Horse Meat MREs »

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Christopher Leete
1 year 11 months ago

Just don’t mess with our beloved pork rib meat ..err…thing.

Josh Noble
2 years 1 day ago

Sweet! Gonna get my white girl on!

John Riedel
2 years 1 day ago

The lasagna latte would still beat the “5 Fingers of Death” frankfurter meal they used to have an abundance of. Eating those you still wouldn’t shit for a week, but it made you consider puking your guts up!

Jorge Hanel
2 years 1 day ago

Great, first this and what next? Marines not being able to even? Ugg boots for PT?

Paul Russell Sr
2 years 1 day ago

Where have all the C Rations gone.they were better than moms home cooking.


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