OLIVE BRANCH, Miss. – For Army Capt. Thor Schmidt’s LinkedIn profile has listed his current position as “recently transitioning” since his separation in 2011, Duffel Blog has learned.
The former 101st Airborne Division G-1 OIC returned to his native Mississippi five years ago and is still seeking employment according to his all-star level profile. Meanwhile, most of Schmidt’s peers have secured positions and been promoted several times, as he notices daily on his feed.
“I was surprised I got so many Likes for celebrating my 5th anniversary of leaving the military but was baffled that no one actually asks me what I am doing now. I guess they just assume I am a professional veteran. I mean, that’s what I tell chicks at the bar anyway,” Schmidt said.
Schmidt used his GI Bill and completed a master’s degree at Stratford University.
“Turns out I have been spinning my wheels the past five years as there are no ‘Recently Separated Officer’ roles at any company,” Schmidt said. “But, with this newly acquired knowledge and Masters of Law Enforcement degree, I should be employed in no time.”
Local and regional headhunters are very aware of his profile, currently ranking in the top 80% for views among his connections. But something seems to be off according to Sarah Blaat, a recruiter with C.R. England trucking.
“I tried to figure out what he did while he was in the military, let alone since he has been out, and I still do not know. His profile reads like some type of evaluation or something,” Blaat said.
Thor says he does not know how some former soldiers do it.
“My intel and public affairs peers transitioned seamlessly into six-figure gigs within the week they separated,” he said, “while I am still fending offers to sell insurance or take an assistant manager position at Best Buy during my transition. I just don’t get it.”
Recent reports say that Thor has been contacted by the US Office of Personnel Management about a possible position in their HR department.