“I was forty-five minutes in and kept failing a scenario about rubbing a victim’s shoulders to calm her down, so just for fun I tried the Konami Code on my controller — up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A,” Morton said.
“Suddenly my avatar shouted ‘Hadouken’ and shot a fireball from his wrist, scoring a direct hit on the game’s Brigade SHARP Coordinator. I heard the printer going and looked up to see my certificate coming out,” he concluded.
Morton then passed the cheat code on to his co-worker, 2nd Lt. Morris Tanner, to see if it would still work. Only three minutes into the training Tanner was able to “Hadouken” a weeping subordinate who wanted him to contact her victims rights advocate. Once his certificate printed the pair sent the information out in a mass email to other officers in the brigade.
“I’m thrilled with their discovery,” said 188th Commander Lt. Col. Miles Capner. “We used to have some poor NCO taking SHARP tests for the entire staff and he’d be cross-eyed by the time he was done.”
“Now we can do it on our own and I’m confident we’ll be 100% compliant by the end of April.”
Creators of the ELITE-SHARP Command Team Trainer say they will make cheating more challenging in the future.
“We spend millions on IA games to train soldiers in a kewl, engaging way so commands don’t have to,” said a spokesman for the Army’s Games For Training Center. “So we’re disappointed they found the cheat code this quickly.
“We should have known that when it comes to sexual assault in the military, some leaders are tireless in finding loopholes. We can promise that our upcoming virtual reality domestic violence game will be much more difficult to beat.”
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