Sources confirm that in the early hours of the morning, First Sergeant Jack Washington performed a 4th degree yellow belt Taekwondo kata, completely nude, in front of his hotel room’s full body mirror.
Washington, an avid martial arts enthusiast, was preparing for a big exam next week at the Rising Dragon martial arts studio in Modesto, California. A successful score on his examinations will see him rise from the amateurish ranks of yellow belt to the esteemed company of the dojo’s red belts.
Jackson’s eyes were narrow and intently focused on his own nude frame as it appeared in the mirror. His concentration was intense, and sweat beaded across his face, collecting on the non-tapered edges of his awkward mustache.
“The straight-leg kata is not for the faint of heart,” said Washington. “It is much more than just, ‘front kick, turn, throat punch, step forward, double-tap roundhouse. That is, its more than a memorized series of deadly strikes, it is a comprehensive system of self-mastery,” he added while breathing heavily in a double low guard position.
The purple glow from the muted television hugged First Sergeant Jackson’s round belly as he swung his hands into a high, phoenix guard. Brows furrowed with concentration, he drug the sole of his bare right foot in a wide arc, shifted his center of gravity, and offered a moderately high front kick towards his own reflection. Penis swinging haphazardly to and fro, Jackson leapt into the air and finished with a flying dragon kick.
“I don’t know what the fuck is going on over there,” said Henry Davis, the man in the room next to Jackson’s, “but, if the rhinoceros doesn’t stop jumping around, knocking over lamps, and kicking the wall, I’m going to call the front desk.”