Navy plans to reduce suicide by monitoring sailors at all times
NORFOLK, Va. — The U.S. Navy plans to reduce suicide in its ranks by monitoring sailors at all times, sources confirmed today.
“Not a moment will pass in a sailor's life where they will not be under observation,” Vice Adm. Robert Burke, deputy chief of naval operations, told reporters. “Sailors will feel secure knowing there is always someone there keeping an eye on them. Whether you're at work, at home, or asleep in your bed, rest assured the Navy is watching you.”
“Sailors are scared we will install security cameras in their homes,” Burke said. “But that is ridiculous. Instead, we'll be using thermal cameras to see though their walls.”
The new plan, dubbed “America's Navy: 100% On Watch” will be implemented next month. The Center For Naval Analyses determined it would be the most efficient way to address the problem of suicide without addressing any of the root causes, officials said.
“We have determined this is the only way to ensure our sailors are safe at all times,” said Burke. “It …
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