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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 113 · Tuesday, 22 September 2026

Pentagon

Trump considers replacing Hegseth with rock or something

White House sources say object would bring “much-needed stability” to Pentagon

Army adopts ‘Your body, my choice’ as new recruiting slogan

First-generation American pilot excited to give family free ride on deportation flight

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Vol. 15 · No. 113

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Vol. 15 · No. 113 · Deployed worldwide

Tuesday

22 September 2026

2342 Zulu

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· Page 2

Marie Kondo urges nation to thank veterans for their service before discarding them

Filed · 1552

WASHINGTON — Acting Deputy Defense Secretary Marie Kondo has issued a suggestion for the American people: Thank veterans for the joy they brought them before ultimately discarding them.

Popular Japanese minimalist and home organizing consultant Marie Kondo fell into the position of Acting Deputy Defense Secretary after qualified individuals kept leaving office after less than six months. The line of succession evaporated so quickly that foreign Netflix icons were being considered for the position, but everyone on the Great British Baking Show passed. (Paul Hollywood reportedly called the offer "half-baked."

The star of "Tidying Up," Kondo previously offered families ideas on how to organize their lives to make more room for things like family time, hobbies, and general gratitude about what life has to offer. Now, as Acting Deputy Secretary of Defense, Kondo has applied her art to the U.S. Armed Forces.

"I recommend that after folding the American flag, you stand them upright in the drawer," Kondo said in a blog post. "This makes it easier to find them later, especially when you have over 5,000 of them."

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