Donald Trump Jr’s Afghanistan bounty hunting trip draws criticism


WASHINGTON – President Donald Trump’s eldest son, Donald Trump Jr., is facing criticism following a recent bounty hunting trip to Afghanistan. Although Trump Jr.’s reputation as a big-game hunter has generated controversy in the past, this latest trip—collecting Russian bounties on American troops—is causing some backlash in Washington.

“It’s well known that I am a hunter of exotic animals,” said Trump Jr. “And when my friend [Russian Ambassador to the U.S.] Anatoly [Antonov] told me that there was a bounty for a certain kind of dangerous prey in Afghanistan, I was like ‘Sign me up!’”

When Trump Jr. learned that the “prey” was actually U.S. military members fighting the Taliban in Afghanistan, he hesitated.

“I’m a skilled hunter, right? But I’m not sure I could take down an American soldier. But then I realized I could just ask Dad if he could ‘stock the pond’ with a few slower troops.”

Criticism of the trip has been building since news of these bounties, offered by Russian military intelligence operatives to the Taliban in exchange for killing American military forces, first broke in late June. And while Trump Jr. was silent on whether he was able to successfully collect a bounty, he was quick to show off a gorgeous “woobie” pelt he acquired while in Afghanistan.

So does the criticism of his bounty hunting bother him?

 “Radical liberals are always whining about my hunting trips,” Trump Jr. responded. “Whether it’s an elephant, a leopard, an endangered Mongolian sheep, or an American service member, they’ll always find some reason to criticize me.”

It should be noted that while many are questioning the ethics of collecting bounties on Americans, criticism of the hunting expedition has not been universal. The animal rights organization PETA responded to an email for comment with a short “That’s fine.” And Sen. Lindsey Graham, when asked his thoughts, responded “I’ve spent decades in military service, and I have to admit that hunting an American soldier for bounty would be quite a thrill. Except for maybe our allies the Kurds, there would be no greater prize in the world.”


Major Crunch

Jack of all trades, master of none. I tweet snark from @welinde and help run weapons-grade shenanigans at www.Damperthree.com.
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