Chicks Totally Wet For Affliction Shirts And Axe Body Spray, Survey Finds
FORT HUACHUCA, Ariz. — Confirming what soldiers and Marines the world over have long privately suspected, a Pentagon study released today has confirmed that women everywhere get extremely horny for guys wearing Affliction T-shirts and Axe body spray.
“I’m glad this survey happened,” said one such good-to-go hottie, Staff Sgt. Tamara Wilkinson, a Blackhawk crew chief with 1-318th Cavalry Squadron, “But I was tired of having to look at the like five percent of enlisted guys who weren’t getting with the message and buying Affliction shirts and drenching themselves in Axe. That is what gets my juices flowing, if you know what I mean.”
“I mean my vagina,” she added.
More than 20,000 female soldiers, Army wives, and random women in communities near Army installations were surveyed, researchers said.
Also very popular and, according to the study, “sure to make any bitches’ panties fly off,” are Ed Hardy shirts, loud pink Polo shirts, and baseball caps with extremely straight, unbent brims.
“We al…
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