By Maxx Butthurt
With all the negative stories coming out of Afghanistan during the final days of the United States’ troop withdrawal, at least one veteran has chosen to put aside his weapons and focus on the future.
Duffel Blog had the chance to sit down with Mohammed Rasheed, a former squad leader with two combat deployments to Kunduz province, who received one of the first business permits under the new regime and started the Brown Rifle Chai Company.
Wearing a western-style shirt with Death Before Reintegration, and heavily tattooed arms bearing the names of dozens of suicide martyrs, Rasheed looked like your typical vet. He explained that while their primary product is chai, the region’s most popular drink, his organization goes far beyond that.
“It’s really more of a lifestyle brand than a beverage company. As the war winds down, you have a large population of unemployed veterans, many with no identity beyond that of a former soldier. We capitalize on that market with shirts, hats, and traditional wear that has an edgy counter-culture feel while still allowing them to shove their service in everyone’s face,” Rasheed said.
In addition to their various chai flavors, the most popular of which are Jihadist Citrus, Mountain Wolf Mint, Sharia Warrior Sherbert, and Classic Pumpkin Spice, Brown Rifle Chai Company has begun placing their iconic AK-47 silhouette logo on everything from plastic water jugs to single-mold rubber sandals.
“I believe I’ve discovered an untapped market here in Afghanistan. By identifying the label of veteran as a personality trait rather than just the name for a former member of the armed forces, we can continue to push vet products in every aspect of their lives. How has no one thought of this before!?” he asked incredulously.
Rasheed’s company has grown at an impressive rate by supplementing their drink offerings with clothing that speaks to the younger generations of veterans and those who would have served had they not been limited by physical issues such as obesity, or a fear that they’d be punished after punching their Pakistani army drill sergeant in the face during basic training.
While local financial data has been hard to obtain, a quick walkthrough of any market outside Taliban military installations throughout the country reveals BRCC-branded clothing in dozens of stalls.
Rasheed hasn’t rested since his incredible success, revealing his newest flyer advertising their upcoming line of traditional shalwars.
Now customers can pick from multiple colors, to include beige, grey, white, or dirty-yellow, and emblazoned with pro-military and moto-slogans such as:
My Other Cart is a Toyota Hilux
Licensed Crusader Hunter
Proud Hajji
Rasheed also pointed out that BRCC doesn’t just cater to men’s fashion, offering updated plays on women’s clothes, such as a burka with Our Husband Served emblazoned on the front, available in black only.
BRCC’s success has only multiplied since the departure of coalition forces. Rasheed has announced the opening of their first brick and mortar chai shop on the Kandahar air base boardwalk, and committed to hiring 50,000 veterans for their subsequent locations by the end of 2022.
Maxx used to be a soldier. Now he feeds on internet comments for sustenance. He is very fat.
Y'all make my day with these. So happy to have subscribed. Keep it up.
The whole thing is so fucking awesome. Absolute genius. THIS: those who would have served had they not been limited by physical issues such as obesity, or a fear that they’d be punished after punching their Pakistani army drill sergeant in the face during basic training.