Report: Psychopaths in gym locker room not wearing any shower shoes

KELLEY BARRACKS, Germany — A number of psychopathic patrons of Kelley Fitness Center are not wearing shower shoes while changing or showering, sources confirmed today.

“It’s something I see every day,” said Senior Chief Petty Officer Phil Kubiak, who works in the Africa Command J7 section. “Guys just standing there, on the bare concrete floor, in nothing…