Blasting Shrill Whistle Throughout Ship Great For Morale, Navy Study Finds

NORFOLK, VA — A surprising US Navy study recently found the greatest way to increase shipboard morale was to blast earsplitting whistles over the intercom at random intervals.

“We were surprised at the results,” said Force Master Chief Rachel Michaels. “We thought better food or larger berthings would make sailors happier. Turns out the thing they like t…