Celebrities devastated by lack of invitations to Marine Corps balls

QUANTICO, Va. — Celebrities everywhere are devastated by cancellations of this year's Marine Corps balls due to Covid-19, sources report.

“Every year I hope some teenager with a shaky grasp on reality asks me to an office party via YouTube,” Janelle Monae said. “People will take it seriously because he's a Marine, and I'll spend the next two weeks being …

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