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Defense Secretary celebrates Passover with slaughter of firstborn budget requests
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Defense Secretary celebrates Passover with slaughter of firstborn budget requests

SecDef Lloyd Austin ritually murdered every budget

Rock Or Something
Mar 29, 2021
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Defense Secretary celebrates Passover with slaughter of firstborn budget requests
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By Rock Or Something

THE PENTAGON — Multiple sources in the Army Chaplain Corps have confirmed that Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin’s celebratory Passover seder turned Biblical when he swore to kill each military service’s firstborn budget request for the next cycle.

“That was some Old Testament shit right there,” said Maj. Gen. Thomas L. Solhjem, the Army…

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