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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 131 · Tuesday, 3 November 2026

Pentagon

Hegseth wears Eisenhower's globe as Halloween costume

Secretary says historic artifact looks better without America's allies

Spirit Halloween store to become pop-up ICE detention center

Army FRG unveils haunted house featuring spouses saying ‘I’m fine’

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Vol. 15 · No. 131

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Vol. 15 · No. 131 · Deployed worldwide

Tuesday

3 November 2026

1541 Zulu

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Veterans · Page 2

Disgruntled veteran kills fourteen beers, shoots tequila

Filed · 1544

WILMINGTON, NC — A local man and former Marine was accused of indiscriminately killing multiple beers and shooting tequila last night at a local bar, witnesses say.

The suspect, 25-year-old Antoine Jones of Wrightsboro, served in the Marine Corps from 2006 to 2010 before being honorably discharged at the rank of Lance Corporal, third award. He was recently laid off from his job as a nighttime security guard at a local shopping mall.

Sources suggest he had unsuccessfully sought psychiatric help for "my shitty fucking life" shortly before entering the bar.

Patrons of the bar first noticed something was off by the look of inconsolable misery on the suspect's face, as well as what a witness called a distinct "the-world-can-go-fuck-itself attitude."

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