Divorced general thinks bases should be named after officers who understand loyalty

ARLINGTON, Va. — The Association of Divorced General Officers issued a statement Saturday supporting the renaming of bases in light of recent racial tensions throughout the United States. Citing “irreconcilable differences” between those officers who fought for the Confederacy and those who stayed true to the Union, Lt. Gen. Peter R. Davidson, ADGO spokesman, called on Secretary of the Army Ryan McCarthy to strip the names of bases honoring those who abandoned commitments they had previously made.

“Now is the time to recognize that these soldiers betrayed their partners in arms," Davidson said. "They stood before their fellow man and took an oath, then turned their backs on America in her hour of sickness. We need to take them off their pedestals and allow these broken bonds to finally heal.”

Davidson, who was forced into retirement after explicit emails between him and his biographer surfaced that ended his marriage of 20 years, considers himself on expert on calling it quits.

"While some people think that we should just stick it out, we're only hurting the kids of America in the long run. It's best they understood the truth."

While Secretary McCarthy and Secretary of Defense Mark Esper both saying that they were open to seeing other people adorn the gates of many southern installations, the White House was quick to annul the discussion.

Citing himself as an authority on loyalty, the President made a statement saying that the country "would remain strongly committed to those Confederate heroes, who really were great people, fabulous people, by the way.” He later tweeted, “Now is not the time to break up with our history. They were all very fine people on both sides of that conflict, and they all played an important role in making America great the first time.”