E-7 caught field stripping for tips

FORT CARSON, Co. — Sgt. First Class Ted Carmichael is facing UCMJ discipline after being caught field stripping for cash tips during his battalion’s 3rd quarter field training exercise.

Class Carmichael was reportedly discovered after senior officers noticed soldiers lining up behind the fuel point to receive his services. Another senior NCO reported watching Carmichael counting dollar bills, which he kept tucked into his boot laces, at his cot.

“Look, what you do in your own time is none of my business,” said Capt. Shauna Crawley, Carmichael’s company commander. “But when it comes into the field and starts impacting the relationship you have with the soldiers you’re supposed to lead? That’s when it becomes an issue.”

Carmichael’s friends don’t appear shocked by the revelation.

“I knew he’d started field stripping in his spare time, just as a hobby,” said Staff Sergeant Wayne Brown. “I mean we’d all dabbled in it from time to time — it’s fun for guys like us, you know? But Ted got really into it. M4s, M9s.”

“Even non-standard-issue stuff like Colts and AR-15s. Guy would do anything.”

His soldiers feel that Carmichael’s punishment is unjust.

“Look, every young soldier needs his barrel cleaned once in a while. It gets old doing it yourself, you know?” said Spc. Charles Palmer, who reportedly paid Carmichael more $100 for multiple private field strips. “It’s nice to have a professional take care of it. And if he makes a few bucks on the side, well, good for him.”

Battalion leaders are investigating claims of Carmichael providing in-home field strips, even for multiple soldiers simultaneously at private weapons-maintenance “parties.”

Carmichael refused to comment for this story. He may be facing additional legal trouble soon, as he has reportedly become engaged to an E-3 in another unit for whom he used to field strip.