FORT MEADE, MD – Sergeant Major Billie Fulbright, a 28-year veteran of the United States Army, assures personnel at the base that he “really want[s] to deploy” in the near future.

Despite serving in the military during a time that saw combat operations in Panama, Somalia, Kuwait, Iraq, and Afghanistan, the SGM has yet to find the opportunity to deploy into a combat zone.

“The timing has really never worked out,” SGM Fulbright told Duffel Blog. “I was in the 82nd [Airborne Division] during Operation Just Cause, but I never got the chance to go to Panama because I had gout and was non-deployable. That effing [sic] killed me. There’s nothing an 11 Bravo [infantryman] wants more than to face the enemy in close-quarters combat and triumph in battle for the sake of American interests abroad.”