General Neller packs massive lip during Congressional hearing
WASHINGTON — The Commandant of the Marine Corps reportedly threw in a damn near baseball-sized sized bomb of Cope into his lip as a fellow general briefed a Senate Committee today, sources confirmed.
Gen. Robert Neller appeared unfazed by multiple looks of concern and disgust from committee members, who were listening to Gen. Paul Selva's testimony at the time.
“Is he serious right now?” Sen. Mike Rounds (R-S.D.) reportedly said to fellow committee member Sen. Roger Wicker (R-Mo.), who could only shake his head in confused shock as Neller casually threw in what witnesses describe as a "massive" fatty.
Moments earlier, Selva’s opening remarks to the committee had been interrupted by a muffled, rhythmic snapping sound from beneath the Joint Chiefs’ desk. This was soon revealed to be the product of Neller performing the “dip snap” like a champ on a recently purchased tin of dank, delicious Copenhagen.
Selva had just begun his overview of the Armored Corps’ response capabilities within Africa…
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