Influx of barracks tiger cubs as stimulus checks arrive

CAMP PENDLETON, Calif. — Wooooooweeee! The barracks is starting to look like that bitch Carole Baskin’s house. We got five live tigers up in this place, ya’all. And it’s awesome as hell.

Holy shit, did those stimulus checks come at the right damn time. Did you know a tiger is only worth two stimulus checks?! Yeah, we didn’t either until we watched Tiger …