FOB DELARAM, AFGHANISTAN – In the mountains of Farah Province, a dismounted rifle patrol from 3rd Battalion, 25th Marines prepares to depart the wire. Rifles are loaded, gear is checked, immediate action drills are rehearsed.

Lastly, and most importantly, the patrol gets a brief from their 0231 Intelligence Analyst, Corporal Oscar Jimenez.

"Intelligence shows that all Afghans are pedophiles. You should get a young boy to accompany your patrol; if you get into a firefight, you can use him to cover your escape while the Taliban are sodomizing him."

Over the six months since they first arrived in Afghanistan, the men of the 3rd Battalion, 25th Marines Intelligence Section have repeatedly honed their skills at producing top notch bullshit.