Iraq Keeps Drunk Texting CENTCOM

AL UDEID AIRBASE, Qatar – Returning from a well-deserved holiday break, members of Central Command's Forward Headquarters were startled to discover more than 100 text messages left on their phone from what looked like an extremely drunk and depressed Iraq.

"Salaams" read the first dozen, repeated every few hours, inter-spaced with an occasional "You up?"

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