Marine Corps Spiritual Reawakening Inadvertently Causes Zombie Apocalypse

QUANTICO, Va. — In a misguided attempt to awaken the warrior spirit of the Corps, a seance conducted by senior officers at Henderson Hall went awry when thousands of fallen Marines began rising from their graves at Arlington National Cemetery this week.

"We figured holding a seance was just as silly as all the other superfluous stuff we were doing to awa…