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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 115 · Friday, 25 September 2026

Pentagon

Military leaders debate who gets to masturbate first in sniper arch

Services clash over historic privilege of being first to defile nation’s newest military monument

Mitch McConnell returns from extended drill weekend

Trump considers replacing Hegseth with rock or something

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Vol. 15 · No. 115

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Vol. 15 · No. 115 · Deployed worldwide

Friday

25 September 2026

1711 Zulu

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← Front page
Army · Page 4

General McChrystal gives police airtight alibi in rolling Stone reporter’s mysterious death

Filed · 1544

ALEXANDRIA, VA – Retired General Stanley McChrystal has been questioned by authorities in the mysterious death of journalist Michael Hastings, sources confirmed Wednesday. Hastings was best known for a 2010 Rolling Stone article which led to McChrystal’s resignation and retirement.

According to investigators, McChrystal was hosting a dinner party at his Alexandria home when Hastings was killed in a car accident in Los Angeles. Attendees at the dinner included prominent defense contractors, professors, and think-tank analysts.

“We had just finished the pork loin when Wadsworth, the butler, came up to Stanley with a silver tray," said Lesley Scarlet, a graduate student of Yale University. "Stan read the note on the tray and rose to make an announcement. He looked somber and gave a gracious tribute to Mr. Hastings, then offered a toast. Things were understandably awkward, but we continued.”

"You could really tell Stan was all broken up over the whole thing," said Michael Green, a defense contractor with Boeing.

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