FORT BRAGG, NC — A company commander with Echo Co., 2nd Battalion, 505th Parachute Infantry Regiment has locked himself in his office and refused to come out after his psyche was apparently shattered by the loss of his treasured Federal Supply Service green notebook, sources confirmed Thursday.

"At first it was a normal day," said 1st Sgt. Joseph Quincy, standing near a group of concerned officers and soldiers gathered around Capt. Eugene Reilly's bolted door. "But then the CO started taking a little longer than usual coming out to PT formation. I mean, he's usually moseying out like five or 10 minutes late, but this was a little ridiculous."

Quincy told reporters the distraught commander finally came out to the company area "with a dead look in his eyes" and began mumbling.