National Guard: We Need Our Apache Helicopters to Defeat Gay Marriage

An Op-Ed from Maj. Gen. Steve Danner, head of the National Guard Association of the United States.

By now, you’ve heard the Army’s Aviation Restructuring Initiative is attempting to take AH-64 Apache helicopters away from the National Guard.

That simply won’t do.

There are several very important reasons the National Guard should keep its Apache helicopters, not the least of which is to help keep our National Guardsmen current on their civilian tank-killing jobs. But the real reason we need to keep our Apache helicopters is to fight back against the federal government’s anti-states'-rights tyranny of gay marriage.

Let me explain.

There’s an old poem which states, “First the Nazis came for the guns, then they came for the Jews."

Well, is it any coincidence that, in Texas, first they came for the Apache helicopters, and then they came for the rest of Texas in the form of Jade Helm? Next thing you know, we’ll have universal healthcare and civil liberties for all our citizens. And that simply isn’t the American way.

See, the National Guard is completely funded by the federal government for the sole purpose of waging war against the federal government. If that sounds crazy, consider that we are also fighting the Taliban in Afghanistan by providing billions of dollars to Pakistan, which, in turn, funds the Taliban.

I knew you’d see things our way.

Some say there’s no precedent to using the National Guard to defy the federal government’s attempts to provide civil liberties to all citizens. But that overlooks some of the National Guard’s greatest moments.

In 1957, the tyrannical Supreme Court decreed by fiat that African-Americans could go to the same schools as white children. The nerve of them! Fortunately, our National Guard was there, protecting the 10th Amendment rights of the State of Arkansas to live in a backwards, racist society.

So in response to the tyranny of gay marriage, we will deploy Attack Weapons Teams (AWTs) of Apache helicopters to locations throughout the United States. This is a mission, which, incidentally, highlights one of the unique capabilities of the National Guard. There are plenty of rules against the Feds acting against our citizens in this way. Fortunately, silly little regulations like posse comitatus don’t apply to the Guard.

No posse comitatus? No mercy!

Maj. Gen. Danner is the head of NGAUS. He can be found lobbying the Federal Government for more parts, fuel, and training funds to maintain the Apache helicopters he needs to fight a war against the Federal Government.