Nine dead at Pokemon Gym located in Sergeant Major’s parking spot
CAMP PENDLETON, Calif. — Nine Marines are dead after an incident at a Pokemon GO! gym located in Sgt. Maj. Brad Kasal’s parking spot at 1st Marine Expeditionary Force headquarters yesterday.
Kasal reportedly rage-parked his 4x4 in the midst of a crowd of at least a dozen Marines who were training their Pokemon at a gym claimed by Team Instinct.
Eyewitnesses say Kasal brutally assaulted survivors of the initial crash. Kasal reportedly grabbed victims by their throat and crotch before spiking them into the asphalt and nearby parked cars.
“For a second I thought we had come across a Machamp,” said one survivor from a full body cast. “By the time I realized it was Sgt. Maj. Kasal, he had already buried his boot about six inches into my taint.”
A number of bystanders were injured during the assault. Kasal also totaled four cars and uprooted one tree.
Witnesses say Kasal loudly argued that “Millennials will be the downfall of my beloved Corps,” and he “long[ed] for the days of the Pepsi Generati…
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