FORT HOOD, Texas — An informal poll of III Corps headquarters at Fort Hood has revealed that not a single member on the staff knows what Mike Toland, the 58-year old Defense Department civilian assigned to the G-3 section, actually does.

Toland has been a familiar face around the headquarters since shortly after the War of Terror began, moving into a large corner office and lining the walls with photos of himself and prominent military and political figures, as well as certificates of appreciation from units no one knew existed.

Since then Toland can be found at most high-level staff meetings, drinking coffee and rarely contributing to the conversation.

“Occasionally he’ll shake his head or sigh when an officer says something he particularly disagrees with,” says one officer who requested anonymity in case Toland actually is important. “But he won’t ever actually offer a solution or alternative idea.”