The following is a response to Gunnery Sgt. Hartman, by Pvt. Pyle’s jelly doughnut.

Jesus H. Christ!

You call yourself a staff non-commissioned officer? How dare you fat shame this wonderful recruit and belittle me! I provide sustenance, nutrition and joy to all who eat me. You, on the other hand, are a grade-A, bona fide jerk, puking malicious, profane invective left and right these poor recruits have no choice but to hear.

Do you love the sound of your rancorous vitriol? Does it make you feel good about yourself, picking on these lowly boots? Who are you trying to impress? What are you compensating for? Perhaps the thinly-veiled, false motivation you so deceitfully flaunt before these impressionable youths with no exposure to the Marine Corps beyond their recruiters’ offices?